Anam Cara Amor Meus
by Ethenigma
Summary: [AU] He is cold and emotionless. But what lays beneath the lies of those who do not see the truths of all truths? As they say, don't judge a book by its cover. KxL...AxC...MxM. On Hold, Gomen ne.
1. Heart of Ice?

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Disclaimer for the whole story: I do not own Gundam SEED or Destiny.**

**Because of the lack there of KxL stories...A friend of mine told me to put this up.

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**Anam Cara - Amor Meus**

**Chapter 1**

**Heart of Ice?**

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**Past**

_"Give me my son back!" A mother cried angrily towards a father with tears dripping from her violet eyes._

_"He's MY son! He is the Ultimate Coordinator, I no longer need you or that natural daughter of yours!" Replied the man harshly, unbeknownst to them that a pair of violet eyes was watching inquisitively. A range of varying emotions marred his cute little face._

_"Iie! The Ultimate Coordinator? Will that bring him happiness? That boy is kindhearted and loves this family very much. He is no different from anyone else, he has not evolved into another specie, ultimate coordinator or not, he's still our baby!" Wailed the mother, mere inches away from breaking down from the horrific news and betrayal of her husband._

_"Foolish woman, mankind has always strived to surpass itself. Because there is happiness in being better! You and your natural daughter begone from here!" Spat the husband with a soul-searing finality accompanied with a stinging slap that smashed the wife's aching heart as she collapsed onto the floor._

_"Chichi-ue! What's the meaning of this? Why are you hurting Haha-ue? Why?" An eight year old brunette stammered questioningly while shivering in fright from the tone that his father used with his mother. He rushed to hug his mother who seemed to be very much out of it._

_"Hmph. Do not become tainted by that woman my son. Come here, now!" The father demanded the boy who was obviously torn by looking at the awful condition that his dear mommy was in._

_The light brunette haired mother stared in disbelief after hearing her husband's vile words, that regarded her as only a "woman." Tears trickled down her eyes unceasingly until a small hand reached out and wiped them away. She turned to look at who could of done such a thing even though she knew who it was, she smiled at the sight of him. 'How very ironic' she thought. The often crying little baby boy of eight years old that always came to mommy whenever he was in pain from even the tiniest of things, was now comforting the crying and pained mommy._

_Talk about role reversal._

_Flashing his mother a warm and genuine smile of reassurance, the boy then bravely stood up to face his father. Staring the man down, eye for eye, the boy spoke in a serious tone never before heard from him, surprising both of his parents, "No." His short but affirmative reply sent the man over the edge._

_"Nani? Kisama! Ungrateful chikusoume!" _**(A/N: Son-of-a-bitch) **

_The tension rose to new proportions until a sudden, rather loud crash broke through the house, startling everyone within the room. A warning message alerted everyone of the presence of the radical terrorist group that was the Blue Cosmos._

_Gunfire buzzed through the room the arguing family occupied, piercing all unfortunate enough to be in its wake. All but one body was pelted with bullets. The irate father was the first to fall, as the boy began to cry of anguish at the demise of his father. Even if he did hurt mommy, he was still his father. The mother cradled the boy in her arms and made her way to a secret safe room nearby._

_Soon after, the boy realized a soaking substance that stained his blue shirt and shorts. Reaching down to touch the substance, he realized that it was his mother's blood that covered him all over. The mother lifted up her son's chin and looked affectionately into his violet eyes, finding strength and comfort from his lovingly worried gaze._

_"Here my son, please do not become of ill-will. When the time comes, you will know who to give this to." The mother lightly spoke to the boy in her arms whilst handing a whitish silver ring engraved with an incomprehensible writing as well as a bracelet with the same writing. An inconspicuous date was engraved on the inner side of the jewelry. "Always love those who your heart cares about. Always and forever." Touching his small chest to emphasize her point. She pushed the codes into the shelter to close it and smiled lovingly to her son._

_"Please live happily..." She kissed her son a farewell on his forehead, as she trailed off losing the life in her loving violaceous eyes, whispering her last breath to her son weakly, "I will...always...love you...Kira..."_

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**Present**

"Ha. Some kind of Ultimate Coordinator I turned out to be." A brunette spat with venomous bitter laced in his voice. His icy piercing violet eyes bore holes into himself, loathing his existence. _'Couldn't even protect the ones I love...'_

He placed a bouquet of flowers he had gardened and hand-picked beside the headstone. He knelt down and hugged the tombstone as if trying to remember the warmth that his mother always surrounded him with in each and every one of her embraces. However, all he felt was the sheer coldness of the fine expensive granite material.

"Haha-ue..." He looked up at the darkening sky. "I've promised...that I would never cry ever again..." Soon afterwards, it began to pour hard. He looked forlornly at the grave and asked, "Then why does it still hurt so much?"

His right hand came up to feel his cheek and felt the water that dripped down from it. He noticed that some of the liquid was warm. Then he trailed his fingers further upward to the source of the warm water. They came from his eyes. After his recognition, his eyes furrowed as his resolve became icy once again, clenching his fist from yet another broken promise. He closed his eyes and began to walk away.

* * *

Kira's mind was in turmoil, waging war against guilt, pain, and hatred. The only feelings he was left to always have after that fateful day. He didn't even shiver from the coldness from the frigid breeze that sliced through his damp clothes.

His heart and soul had always been cold ever since that day. It was engraved in his mind forever and it was something he could not let go so easily. After all, the Blue Cosmos' target was the Ultimate Coordinator. Naturally, he blamed his existence for his mother's death. It wasn't fair to have her die while saving him, it wasn't supposed to be like that. He was weak, powerless, and afraid.

The trauma of his past haunted his young mind and plagued him ever since, sending him into an eternal abyss of loneliness. Regardless, the perfect being trudged his way through a rigorous life and created a multi-billion dollar business company that was Ultimate Freedom Inc. all the while remaining remarkably anonymous.

He went by the pseudonym of Mr. Hibiki, a tribute to his late mother. His ruthless tactics and masked identity, even in the sight of his business partners, attributed to his amassing a fortune. Universal reports identify the company to be a plexus of corruption and nothing much but a selfish corporation. In fact, if the company wasn't sheltered by its respected and honest motherland, that was revered by many countries, Ultimate Freedom would have long since been attacked by government agencies.

In an extra step of precaution, Kira's business became dormant 2 years ago, ever since it successful enough to maintain self-sufficiency. Many of its activities were top secret so in a sense, it was a business plexus. However, its nature of wielding and utilizing power in secret to subvert universal laws, morals or ethics was not the case. Only a select few members knew of the true nature of Ultimate Freedom.

In the public eyes, the company wasn't anything but just a bunch of greedy corporate businessmen, despite how wrong they were. However, Kira didn't mind as long as his business helped every cry of those in need, even if it was not heralded and publicized as great deeds to benefit his corporation. Great deeds in his opinion, should not be done in order for the medals, benefits, orders, or public approval, they should be done to help humans in need. The smiling faces of many orphans he himself personally visited and aided by purchasing land and building shelters himself, was enough to satisfy his pained heart.

_'I cannot die yet.' His mind often repeated over and over again while trying to come up with reasons to keep living._

He bought and personally brought food to many homeless and abandoned kids. He saved thousands of lives personally while his business saved countless lives. He was indeed an uncredited hero that he himself didn't give much credit to. Every life he saved, he hadn't seen that he saved them. He neglected it in his quest to help more, never being satisfied with helping one person to the next.

There were only a few other companies that were almost as successful as his business. Infinite Justice Inc. was one of them. Led by a reliable emerald eye youth, the company soared into new heights especially after the endorsement of it's motherland, Zaft. Contrary to Freedom, Justice established a respected public appearance for its good deeds that were often publicized for the benefits of the company and its endorser. They were fair, but only helped Coordinators, something that even the bright and youthful President of the company had overlooked, no thanks to his father.

Last but not least was the Blue Cosmos, though quite radical, they fed off the envy and hatred of extremists alike. However, they managed to attain a good reputation in the media for their often exaggerated and publicized deeds for the people. Naturals, that is. Despite their constant corrupt secretive dealings that ultimately only benefitted themselves in their 'helping' of those in need.

The unforgiving and brutal world conspired many lies and deceptions, but the hard truth was something that many people neglected to see with there own eyes. The public, often fed with lies or animosity jump at the chance to hate and develop 'their own thoughts' about a company, which was really not their own. If Kira was to put on a veil of happiness and spot limelight on the good of his deeds, he would be no better than the likes of the Blue Cosmos. True to his word, Kira remained cold and emotionless despite his true intrinsic kindhearted nature that precipitated his endless deeds. All that mattered were the smiles of all the grateful children, who see the truth clearer than those who easily succumb to negative feelings provided by propaganda or 'expert analysis'.

After all, it is easier to hate one another, than to love one another. Blinded by the rashness of the mind, people often fail to see that hurting one another because one is hurt, will only lead to irreparable sadness in the end.

One boy knew all too well of such irreparable sadness. He walked down the lonely path of his righteousness and beliefs while acknowledging the fact that his life would remain dark and hollow without true mirth, despite that fact engraved in his heart, he refused to let himself walk a path of true hatred and remained a part of himself that would never change.

That is why Kira's purpose for helping the cries of all was not for his own personal gain, nor his company's gain.

It was a tribute to his late mother's will and final wish.

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**Kira's POV**

_"My son, please do not become of ill-will." _

_Haha-ue._

_Ai shiteru..._

_Always and forever._

_But...it's hard. No matter how much I do, no matter how much those few remaining here do for me, my heart will always alone. I cannot forgive myself, for I have sin through my own fault._

The endless psychological war repeated itself over and over in my mind again.

The chill of the wind that slices through my coat returns me to the reality of the world briefly, though its lack of warmth compares nothing to the chill in my mind.

I faintly notice that I'm almost back to the apartment I shared with a friend of mine by the seaside. I realize that my blond bodyguard had been waiting for me the whole time, seeing as how his clothes are as soaked as mine are. He has a cautioned expression on his face, he probably doesn't want to intrude or bother me.

"Arigatou, gomen ne..." I say to him, startling him from his discreet expression.

"U-uh, iie, it's no problem Kira." He fumbles out of his stupor, scratching his head dumbly.

"Let's go Mwu-san, we need to change. It's almost time that we've got work to do."

"Ah."

We walk to our quarters and I put on some non-expensive (just the way I like it) set of clothes. Just a simple dress khaki jeans, a black and silver belt, a pair of white sneaks, a white shirt and my nurse jacket. It's my favorite one of all the nurse jackets, it's a light blue poly/cotton blend v-neck that's very comfortable, my sister gave it to me as a gift.

Speaking of which, I wonder how she's doing. I hope Uzumi-san's business isn't too harsh on her, learning how to lead a country at 20 years old is a very tough burden...come to think of it, I haven't seen her in awhile. The thought of it makes me sad for awhile, until a good idea strikes my head.

Mwu and I exit our rooms almost simultaneously and I decide to take my plan into action.

"Mwu-san, do you mind if we go visit my sister today?" I ask politely.

"Ah, sure kid. Haven't seen her in a while ne?" He replies gayly, even though knowing that I'm his superior, he still manages to call me 'kid,' which is nice to hear. Too bad I haven't been been one ever since that day...I begin to daydream again.

Thankfully, Mwu puts one of his calloused hand on my shoulder to drag me back into reality. I half-smile appreciatively.

"Let's go. We have about two hours before we have to go to work, but I'm sure she'll more than likely take that much time, ne?"

"Ah."

I hear a sudden grumble. It's Mwu's stomach, and I laugh half-heartedly.

"I see it, you would like her to get some food eh?"

"Hehe," he scratches his head amusingly, "Ah. Let's go."

I half-smile again, glad to have a honest friend.

**Mwu's POV**

Kira and I move towards our destination, glad that the rain has stopped and everything is all sunny again. As usual, he opts to walk there. This kid sure is something, he has billions of dollars yet doesn't use it to buy himself a car, not even a cheap one. He doesn't use the company limos, doesn't even use the McLaren F1 GTR his sister bought him. He would have long sold that car to give the money to a charity or given it to me, if not for the fact that it was a gift and gifts aren't meant to be given away. For Christ sakes, he doesn't even buy himself a bicycle.

_'Every dime I make will go to charity'_ huh? I've often hear him say that to me every time I asked until I got tired of getting the same answer. The countless times he would help others even if it meant killing himself in the process yet he never said a word of refusal. Even though I've been a family friend of his for a long time now, I still don't understand this boy. How could he be like he is? Maintain a cold exterior even though at heart, he's one of the kindest and loving boy anyone could ever meet, if circumstances were different, he would have lived happily. But fate deals its blows and spreads its woes, as some things can't be helped.

His heart and mind is strong, even though he regards himself as weak. Humble little kid, hell, why am I calling him a kid? Kid's practically grown up, maybe a little too fast. But, even that can't be helped, it was not of his own choice...However, helping others without being credited is his choice...loving his remaining family and keeping a piece of himself is his choice... maintaining his true nature and refusing to indulge in his achievements, in a sense, he is the perfect being, someone who shouldn't exist only because the envy of others prevent him to exist.

I can see that he is indeed hanging onto his essence by a mere thread. He's missing that part of him that was lost that day. It seems as if he will never be able to return to his self, the return to innocence.

Breaking out of my reverie, we walk by a group of teenage girls who ogle Kira like he's a piece of meat and soon become infatuated with him in a matter of seconds. They giggle about how good he looks and make their cutest expressions as if they're going to win him over like that. Ha, fat chance ladies.

I see Kira takes notice and turns his head towards their irritatingly noisy direction and scares them off, throwing out every possibility of him being cute. His violet eyes are laced with obvious fearsomeness and undeniable anguish, the same facade he always wears to ward off people like that.

His icy glare frightens the girls and they scurry away muttering things about how Kira wasn't even that pretty anyway while throwing a couple insults. I've seen this scene plenty of times before, being a bodyguard of the mystery that is Kira. He knows what girls like that want though and often see right through their souls, probably from his genetic enhancements. He realizes that they only see his handsome face and the nurse outfit on his shoulders. Things like that make me sick, and I'm sure it makes him even sicker.

The rest of the trip was uneventful, despite a couple reruns of the same nature. We near the Orb headquarters in Onogoro and walk nonchalantly inside. No one recognizes us, nor gives us a warm reception, heh, very typical of them, seeing as how they are oblivious as much as the public is about who Kira's true identity.

Fortunately, the counter receptionist, Asagi Caldwell if I remember correctly, is nonetheless very fond of Kira. She doesn't know who he actually is, but is still nice enough to grant us unrestricted permission to roam the building seeing as how we're frequent visitors.

We walk to the elevator and Kira punches in the secret algorithmic code that leads directly to his sister's room. Upon entering and being greeted by the Princess of Orb warmly, I see that Kira's icy glare changes into one of his (now rare) warm expressions. I may not understand this boy, but I do know how he acts and I am grateful to serve him. I will always try my best to protect him, for your sake, Via-sama.

**Kira's POV**

I walk into my sister's room and am tackled by her with enough force to send me into the ground. I smile half-heartedly, I've done too much of that today, but I'm glad to see her well so I try my best to give her at least some assurance that I am getting better. Though, I know she knows I'm not...call it a twin's hunch I guess? I can see genuine concern in her emotionally charged amber eyes that soon I twitch in nervousness. Damn. Cagalli's mad.

**Cagalli's POV**

Asagi informs me that a guest was coming up and to my happy and mad surprise, it's Kira. I run up to him and tackle him, seeing as how he had that brooding and icy expression of his. He needs to lighten up some more.

"Baka!" I glare at him trying to show my ferocity and I can feel him twitch and a sly smirk comes to my lips seeing as how I got him on the run.

"Why haven't you visited me in awhile, huh Kira?" I pout and say in the sweetest voice I can manage. The look on his face is priceless! Haha! The great and mighty Kira is twitching and stammering with his words! Hehe.

**Kira's POV**

"A-ano, ah, see, uh what happened was, ah." I stutter out partly because of Cagalli's voice and partly because of her death grip on my favorite shirt, no less the one she gave me! Uh oh, I'm in trouble, I look to Mwu and he just laughs smugly at my plight. My own bodyguard! I thought he was suppose to be taking bullets and shit like that for me?

I must admit, I haven't had this expression in a long long time, but it's a bit of a welcomed change. I give Mwu the I-am-going-to-lower-your-payment glare and he starts to sweat as he is in a tough situation. I give him a smug look, haha, serves you right.

Mwu tries to approach us and then backs off after seeing Cagalli's I-will-fire-and-castrate-you gaze. What a coward! This is the man who's suppose to be my bodyguard? What the hell!

Seeing as how I have some advantage, I say, "Oneechan...you sound...like...a...girl."

Oh man.

Big mistake.

Good job, good going child prodigy.

I see why Mwu backed off. Cagalli now has a face of pure fury, I knew that sweet expression only hid that wrath. Oh man, she's balling her fists...That smile...That evil smile...I'm dead.

Oh shi--

She hugs me.

What the hell?

She's laughing!

What the hell!

Ohhh, now I get it. I smile three-fourths heartedly to show her my appreciation for her little antic. Heh, arigatou Cagalli. I'm glad I still have you sis.

**Cagalli's POV**

Well I think I should end my charade now, seeing as how I've scared him long enough. I wish I had a camera, that sure was a Kodak moment. Still, I know his scars are practically un-healable...but at least he's not brooding. Baka.

Seeing as how he recognizes my trick, he smiles almost genuinely. I'm glad for that, it's been awhile since I've seen him crack a smile at least over half a smile. I get up from the ground while Kira follows suit.

"Say Kira, why have you not visited me lately huh? All this work I have to do, you know the only time Otou-sama lets me off is when you visit." I ask back in my regular 'boyish' tone.

"Gomen ne, Cagalli." Oh crap, he's back to brooding again, he must have visited Haha-ue's grave or something, that's the only reason why he would be so gloomy.

I place my hand on his shoulder to comfort him and he softens a bit. Our twin powers activate and he nods in comprehension.

"Arigatou..." he says softly.

All of a sudden, we hear a large grumble emitting from the stomach of Mwu-san. He smiles sheepishly and sighing in mock-disappointment, "Follow me, bakas."

**Normal POV**

Minutes passed by as the three converse about unimportant things, mostly because Mwu-san was quite unabashed in devouring the food. Kira and Cagalli just laughed at him most of the time as he ate too much too quickly and choked many a times. Kira looked at the Rolex watch, that Cagalli had given him, and much to his dismay, he knew he had to part with Cagalli to his part time 'job' on Mondays. Cagalli gave a farewell hug to Kira and gave Mwu a stern look to keep him on his toes.

"Say hi to Uzumi-san for me, okay, Cagalli?"

"Hai, Kira-kun." Cagalli teased.

"Well, Ja Caggy-chan," Kira playfully teased back, referring to their names when they were young and innocent.

'Caggy-chan' just rolled her eyes playfully as a wave of reminiscence swept through her mind. She brushed it off quickly as she tried to focus on the matters at hand and waved a farewell to her beloved brother before disappearing into the building. Cagalli wasn't very good in expressing her emotions by words, but she would always be good at expressing her emotions through her actions. One of the reasons why Kira had a fondness of her since she was unafraid to show her emotions on her clothes, so to speak.

* * *

On the way towards the hospital, Kira manages to snag the attention of a dozen teenage natural thugs each hiding a concealed weapon.

"I hear you gave our women a dirty look." The apparent leader yelled from behind the two men.

Unfazed, Kira uncaringly turned around and seeing the weak force, he shrugs and returns to walk alongside an unfazed Mwu as well.

"Don't turn around from us you bastards!" The leader viciously spat out.

Upon hearing the insult, Kira goes into an intrinsic irate form and soon his pupils shrink into tiny pinpricks as his violet iris dilates. Mwu immediately recognizes his form and says, "Go easy on them kid..."

Upon turning around, most of the thugs dash for safety and the leader himself is stricken with fear. Regaining his composure and in a futile effort to save face with the remainder of his crew, the leader blindly charges Kira with a 5-inch switchblade. Kira effortlessly dodged and used his god-like speed to disable the leader in one blow to the solar plexus. Not even Mwu kept up with Kira's movements, but he was glad that Kira took it easy.

_'You're lucky he just saw his sister.' Mwu thought amusingly._

"What are you?" The remaining thugs cried as they ran cowardly back into the streets.

Kira whispers bitterly, "The Ultimate Coordinator."

* * *

**Orb Children's Hospital**

Kira and Mwu checked into the hospital and performed their usual routines. As usual, the duo smuggled some 'illegal' foods for all of the ill children. Thankfully, many of the children were released from the hospital since they're injuries have healed. Unfortunately, a special girl had been forced to make a home out of the place, but was very close friends with a certain brunette. A year ago, Kira befriended a young girl of 7 by the name of Conille, he personally nursed her back to health after finding her abandoned.

Even more tragic news came when Kira (who graduated summa cum laude and became the youngest person ever to earn a Ph.D. in the field of Doctorate of Medicine, along with an endless list of accomplishments, all hidden from public eyes by Orb government by his recommendation to remain anonymous) had diagnosed Conille of an unknown disease. After realizing the danger her life was in, Kira had gladly funded millions of dollars (anonymously) too the children's hospital and raised several other health institutes. Sadly, later on he even pitched in manual labor to build the hospice center for people like Conille who needed palliative care, for she was found to be terminally ill.

Kira promised to keep her happy for the remainder of her life as he often visited, read books, and brought several treats for her. She was one of the reasons why Kira volunteered as a nurse, in order to bypass the visiting hours. It was the rare times Kira could be found to crack a genuine smile, even though behind it would be nothing but sadness. He knew he had to move on though, so he obediently did his job while correcting many of the treatments for patients the doctors there often faultered in.

After a few hours, the clock struck 5 o'clock. Kira and Mwu bid farewell to Conille, giving her a hug and a toothache as well. The duo started making there way to the next task at hand.

**Mwu POV**

"Man kid, those kids get rowdier and rowdier everytime we visit, ne?" I reply warily, worn out by those brats. It seems like the kid enjoyed himself a lot more than usual, he's not even showing the least bit wearing down. He sure loves children a lot, but I've known that for awhile ne? I hope he doesn't take it too hard when she passes...Life is unfair, to her and to him...

"Ah." he replies casually in another one of his efforts to cut the conversation short in order to go to his reverie. I need to snap him back to reality if he is to progress, he deserves at least another chance at happiness. The world maybe unfair, but this child has been a saint in the eyes of who knows him and he deserves more.

"Say kid, why do you take part time jobs?" I ask timidly a question I know all too well the answer to, but decided to ask anyway as it was the only question I could come up with.

_'Every dime I make will go to charity'_ I replay in my mind.

"Every dime I make will go to charity."

Sighing, he chuckles a bit, probably at my blind persistence but I don't mind. We walk, again, to his part time job that he actually earns money from, which is Onogoro Mall's Burger King. Another reason why the boy's such an enigma, how can a prodigy and business savvy and supposed to be pride and ego filled teen put on an apron and flip burgers with the twists of his wrists? I know though, Kira is not anything like that. By far, he should be respected far more than he is given, it angers me to think of all the disrespect he ever had in his life along with all the credit he willingly did not receive. How? Why?

No. That doesn't matter anymore, I start to see why he is the way he is. He's probably more grown up than me. I need to help him though as a friend, the way he has always treated me, never just a bodyguard.

* * *

_**Onogoro Mall**_

We arrive at the employee entrance and a brilliant idea comes to mind. Hehe. So, to spice things up for the kid, I ask the manager to allows us to have a mask day. Thankfully, he agrees after I whisper a pleasing incentive to him.

I then hand the kid a goofy pink mask, that I've been dying to get on the kid for awhile, it covers his entire face except his eyes. He reluctantly accepts it after the constant nagging of the employees and I. I of course, look much cooler in my jet black Batman mask. Haha, I know he'll hate me for this but it can't be helped.

**Kira's POV**

...Humiliatingly, I place the pink mask over my face. Ah Mwu, I will definitely lower your payment my friend.

"Oy kid, that mask accentuates your lovely violet eyes." Mwu says ever so gaily.

I stare right through him. I will definitely lower your payment my friend. After awhile though, I half-heartedly laugh it off, after all, it is pretty funny. I return back to business of asking, "May I have your order?" except my tone is of course emotionless and often a few customers leave or just come up to take a picture of my embarrassing plight. Ah who cares, I see a couple kids laughing at me and I decide it was worth it and play along.

"Hey kids, do you all want to see the Cape Crusader here eat this pie?"

They all nod knowing what I want to do. Exact my revenge, or part of it.

"Huh kid? I'm not hungry." Mwu says unconcerned, much to the delight of the kids and I, the blond remained oblivious to what I wanted to do.

"Well okay." I say in my fakest, and cheesiest tone I could come up with and bam! The pie smashes into his bewildered face.

Revenge is sweet.

The children erupt in laughter, doubling over while Mwu maintains his funny bewildered expression. I just smile contentedly. After awhile, we remained in the same position, Mwu's still shocked at what I did, but I can see his lips curve into a semi smile. The children stopped laughing to take a good luck again. I than see another opportunity.

I delicately use my index finger to swipe a part of the pie on his face and lick it gently. "Mhmm."

Mwu is aghast at my actions while the kids are speechless for a moment. After what I did finally registered, the kids broke down laughing on the ground, while Mwu turned beet red. Man what I did was so gay, but it was worth it though. Haha! That expression on his face is priceless! Where's a camera when you need one?

**Normal POV**

Unbeknownst to them, a pair of baby blue eyes intently noticed the scene and laughed amusingly at the antics as well. After awhile, the laughing died down as the kids were herded out of the scene and Mwu cleaned himself up in the back. The seemingly vacant mall provided a long time of idleness and leisure for all the employees.

**Kira's POV**

I decide to turn on the TV nearby the register to watch some news, maybe Cagalli would be on or something, I don't know. But it sure is better than sitting around. I constantly need something to occupy my mind...I don't want to let down Cagalli...I can't be selfish, after all I am her brother.

TV reporter, "A terrorist group has attacked and killed off several thousand victims."

My hands turn into fists after hearing such a loss in life. How much blood must be shed until people can accept each other?

"It is suspected that Ultimate Freedom Inc. may have played a part in this, however that is unconfirmed and denied out-righteously by the Emirates of Orb."

My knuckles begin to pale, how could they suspect such a thing? From my company no less.

**Mwu's POV**

I come back from the washroom to find the kid boiling with raging fury. I notice that he's tuned into some news channel but I am wondering as to what could stir him up so much.

"Traces of such activity from a dormant corporate power such as Freedom Inc. can be led to casualties estimated to be over 7,500 Coordinators."

I see his eyes glaze over in frustration as I myself am tempted to smash something to pieces. For Pete's sake, the President of a good willed company is the Ultimate Coordinator...

I need to do something quick before the kid loses it completely. Cagalli! She's probably the only one who can stop him from going down the deep end. I need to call her quick, dammit, where's a phone when you need one?

I dash for the nearest active phone line, which would be my cell phone that I unceremoniously misplaced. Chikuso, hang in there kid.

**Normal POV**

TV, "The attack was located in Mendel Colony."

An eery silence followed soon after. The brunette no longer was visibly angry.

_"The attack was located in Mendel Colony."_

However, his darkened violet hues revealed the tempest of wrath within his calm appearance.

_"Mendel Colony."_

The place that changed his life. The place that his world shattered. Was the place of her death.

Memories of the scene flooded his mind. The blood, the violence, the chaos. Her blood.

Only this time, his innocence was already broken. His mind drifted into the cataclysm within the trauma of his past.

To make matters worse, a few minutes later, a ruffian walked up to the register and unceremoniously made his presence known to the troubled youth.

Kira looked at the man in disgust for he knew this man was no up to no good. The terrifyingly intimidating blackened violet eyes scared the living daylights out of the grown man, or anyone to behold those eyes for that matter. If not for his own rage, he would not have recovered at all and went back home bawling like a little baby.

However, the malice in his heart allowed him to summon enough resentment to continue his blind rage, "Listen here you skinny little monstrous patchworker. My kid here says you attacked him, and I don't like that." He spat venomously, willing himself to overcome the fear in his bones by turning to his source of anger, as he pointed to one of the teenage thugs earlier today.

Kira remained cold and dark, not even admonishing the fact that the ruffian was speaking to him at all.

Boiling with anger at the boy's emotionless actions, he soon repressed it after seeing an intimidating large blond appear to the side of the kid.

The teenage thug on the other hand was terrified as he mentally demanded his father to stop, even though they were armed, Coordinators were genetically enhanced with more gifted speed and the used to be violet eyed boy exhibted much of that. Much to his dismay, his father tried to save face by saying, "Listen here you scrawny bastard..."

Kira indeed looked scrawny by his appearance, but appearances are deceiving for underneath his clothes lay a muscular but not overly muscular frame, strengthened with years of training in every martial arts and combat styles unheard of any humans except the exclusively elite fighters. Along with the perfected frame of the Ultimate Coordinator, Kira's combat abilities were factually unsurpassable.

Much to the ruffian's dismay, Kira remained emotionless once again causing the man's anger to boil once more. Forgetting the blonde's presence, the man spat "I will kill you if you ever lay your hands on my son again."

The tiniest fragment of Kira's inner kindness and sanity caused him to think that the man's 'request' was reasonable, regardless of how he conveyed his message. Seeing as how he didn't want to fight nor did he actually beat up the teenage thug, Kira just placed his anger aside. _The man was just protecting his kids right?_

"You heartless low class commoner."

Though Kira didn't take no offense since he was used to much worse, Mwu glared daggers that were willing the man to die as he began to leave. But then he said the vilest words that could ever be possibly said to the brunette.

"I will kill your daddy and mommy as well."

That was the final straw that broke the camel's hump.

* * *

**Mwu's POV**

Oh man this is bad. Damn that asshole. I hold myself back from lunging at the jackass myself, seeing as how Kira's well-being is more important.

He's kneeling down on one knee while clutching his chest.

This is bad.

He's convulsing with rapid spasms but still won't look up.

This is bad.

After a moments pass and that damn ruffian and his children walk out of sight, I worry more for the kid. He no longer clutches his chest as his hands drop from him nimbly. He looks up at me and a shiver of terror goes up my spine. He's no longer in that state that he's in whenever he's angry. His eyes, they seem so different, so angry, so out of control, it seems as if he has evolved to a new level. His pupils dilated this time and I can no longer make out the violet iris of his, which were replaced with a tint of blood red anguish.

This is very bad.

Once more, I shiver in complete fright uncontrollably, his now darkened eyes with a reddish glint chilling me to the core. Enveloped in pain, misery, and hatred, I wonder if that was the final straw to break his remaining sanity. He pushes me back gently, too gently. He calmly rises up. The hatred in his eyes still remaining, his eyes alone are scary enough, if it weren't for the pink mask, I would have long since soiled myself.

As I look more carefully into his eyes, I see that there is no more light. It seems the darkness has swallowed him whole. All seems hopeless, maybe I'm being a little melodramatic but his eyes, they give it all away. I'm not mad at the kid, seeing as how he should have been full of pure hatred and irreparable sadness a long time ago. All those tragedies that happened to him as a young child.

The time I found him alone, I cannot even imagine what could have happened to him then. His eyes were out of tears and they were different as well. But those eyes were imbued with sadness, not this hatred and fury. It's a shame that such a pure and kindhearted soul has been rife with terrible events. What's more difficult to believe is that I can recognize that who the hatred is aimed at.

I downcast my head in a shame at my failure as a protector, a bodyguard, and as a friend. Gomen nasai Via-sama.

I've failed you and your son.

* * *

**Normal POV**

The brunette jumped over the counter, ready to disappear from the face of the earth. Hatred and pain consumed him and he knew there was no coming back. _'Gomen nasai...Haha-ue...Oneechan...I'm too weak.' the broken pieces of his sanity thought apologetically._

There's no coming back.

There's nothing to come back to.

Only hatred and pain that he has felt in this world.

Sad dreams, why are all his dreams sad?

The Ultimate Coordinator should not even exist, it's better that way.

Through his misery and inner turmoil, he was quickly losing the war within him...

It was then that a pair of arms encircled his waist as a head gently rested on the crook of his back.

**Kira's POV**

I've lost to the darkness.

I'll see you soon Haha-ue.

Just as soon as I made up my mind and jump across the counter to run back to my house and do the deed for the good of the earth, a pair of arms hold me back.

They are warm...caring...devoted...and loving? Just like Haha-ue's...but that's impossible...

She died a long time ago...because of me. Because of...the Ultimate Coordinator. Whose existence shall never be forgiven. I know all too well because I am the result...

A small head flattened itself on my back, snapping myself from my musings. Who can it be? Who could approach such a monster like me? It's holding me back from going down the deep end...like it wants me to live...who would want me to live? Haha-ue? Iie, she's gone... Cagalli? Iie...Oneechan has a country to run soon, and she will live better when she doesn't have to worry about me...I know that's a lie but hell who am I kidding, the truth is I'm a burden to her, to them, to all who I care about...That's why, I need to go.

Then who?

I finally regain a tiny bit of my consciousness, enough for me turn around to see who would do such a thing...

My throat hitches and instantaneously becomes dry at the sight of _her._

My heart stops beating.

She's so beautiful.

This can't be real.

No one can be this beautiful...

Baka-na...

My eyes of self-hatred and overwhelming pain remain a steely and icy resolve that bore right through her soul but she doesn't so much as flinch at it. Instead, it's as if her ethereal baby blue eyes pierce and read my soul, filled with pure concern and kindness...

Her soul, why is it calling out to the tiniest remnants of my sanity?

This feeling...It's eerily familiar, like I've known it before. Who are you?

Why are you helping me?

**_Her_ POV**

My throat hitches...That has never happened before.

My heart stops beating...That has never happened before neither.

He's so handsome.

But those agonized eyes of his, they seem so familiar yet so different. However, they do not scare me as I am not frightened by such false frigidity. I can see there is something more There is unmistakable strength, courage, kindness and love deep down those aggrieved eyes of yours.

It is not fear that has driven me to him.

It is not lust that has driven me to him.

It is my soul that is driven to him.

Please come back.

You're in pain. So much he has gone through. I can feel your heart in motion, deep and in your heart of passion...

I know he wants to leave for good, but I don't want him to leave.

I want him to stay.

**Normal POV**

An eternity passed within a matter of seconds between the two, neglecting everything in just this one moment. It seemed the inhabitants of the mall deserted the place. For a few seconds, it was just a world for two.

The girl began to sing a light tune as the seconds passed by.

_  
Mizu no naka ni yoru ga yureteru  
Kanashii hodo shizuka ni tatazumu  
Midorinasu kishibe  
Utsukushii yoake wo  
Tada matte iraretara  
Kirei na kokoro de_

The boy was looking over the beauteous youth before his eyes.

Kurai umi to sora no mukou ni  
Arasoi no nai basho ga aruno to  
Osiete kureta no wa dare  
Dare mo ga tadori tsukenai  
Soretomo dareka no kokoro no naka ni

An intrinsic feeling that was familiar yet alien emanated from within the confines of his body as he eyed the girl, not of sensuality, but of need.

Mizu no nagare wo shizumete  
Kureru daichi wo uruosu shirabe  
Ima wa doko nimo nakutemo  
Kitto jibun de te ni ireruno  
Itsumo, itsuka, kitto

His very being craving the sight of her that gradually led him back to the world, seemingly giving him a reason to live. 

Mizu no akashi wo kono te ni  
Subete no honoo wo nomikonde nao  
Hiroku yasashiku nagareru  
Sono shizukesa ni tadoritsuku no  
Itsumo, itsuka, kitto  
Anata no te wo tori...

However, her heavenly extrinsic appearance was not the most alluring of her being, it was just her soul that called out to his, ever so softly yet strongly.

After several minutes, the brunette finally managed to snap out of his trance. Upon coming back to reality, he realized he was gripping the said beautiful girl's pale tiny hands, a little too roughly. But she did not wince nor back off as she selflessly kept her steady and concerned gaze to coax the troubled boy. The slight assuring smile steadying his inner turmoil.

Tracing the contour of her fingers subconsciously, he noticed a whitish silver ring located around her left ring finger.

Realization struck him as hard as a ton of bricks as fate once again decided to deal its merciless hand.

Soft and wavy, light pinkish hair...Angelic pale complexion...Celestial voice of the heavens...Altruistic crystalline baby blue eyes...Perfectly shaped face...The epitome of perfection...

There in his face was the one who would one day marry the President of Infinite Justice Inc., Athrun Zala.

It was none other than, Lacus Clyne.

**Lacus' POV**

I feel him tracing my fingers. The warmth in his hands radiating through his gloves, even though all I can see of him are those troubled eyes of his, while the rest of him is covered by some article of clothing, I know him. His eyes gradually returning to a different hue. I do know him or at least, my soul does.

He stumbles across the promise ring on my finger and he stops dead in his tracks. His mouth becomes agape as he seems to have discovered something very troubling. His eyes flash with a million emotions that overwhelm me as well.

Quickly, he turns around letting go of my hands, even though I wish he wouldn't ever let go...wait did I just say that?

It can't be...

"Gomen nasai." He whispers quietly, his voice, even if it was just a whisper, itheld so much emotions in it. I hope he will be alright now...I snap out of my thoughts to see that he has vanished and made his way through the exit. Realization struck swiftly as he may have realized the fact that Athrun Zala is my fiancé...

Does that mean he's jealous?

Iie...he's just feeling bad about being in a moment like that with someone who's taken.

I love Athrun...

Don't I?

And he loves me...

But why do I feel sad?

It can't be...

I fiddle my precious ring unconsciously, vaguely recalling who had given it to me.

Disrupting me from my reverie, the blond man who was with _him_ asked for where he went. A caring flame radiated from his cobalt blue eyes and I trustingly point towards the direct _he_ went in.

Even though I did not get a good look at his face or his real eyes, I feel as if...

It can't be...

**Mwu's POV**

Did my eyes just deceive me?

Iie.

I need to find him first.

Frantically reaching the exit, I curse myself for not wearing a jacket as the sheer cold penetrated through my clothes. Damn, it's getting late...I need to find him. I haven't failed them yet.

I run to where ever my legs and my subconscious takes me.

They led me to the memorial for Via-sama that the kid built and maintained thoroughly throughout the years. Chikuso. Am I too late?

But it seems he has already replaced the soiled bouquet of flowers he placed earlier today with a small white rose.

A smile emerges on my lips.

He's still fighting.

An amazing kid he is.

I can't help but wonder though...

Already acknowledging my presence, he smiles at me. But this time, it's one of his super rare genuine smiles that I have never seen him used since he was just a baby.

He's crying...again. But his eyes have a hint of inner peace. They were no longer stark and frightening. They reverted back to those violaceous eyes that held intense passion and persevering determination.

It's been hard on him.

But I'm glad that he has found his share of peace.

He waves at me, telling me to return to my apartment. Naturally I comply, but only to phone Cagalli and tell her things are under control, she's glad but wants to check up on her brother herself soon, if she gets off work. I come back outside to bring him a jacket and he has an appreciative expression, even though he probably did not feel the chill. He has that distant look on his face, and my instinct tells me to keep distance so I give him his desired space. He will be okay, somehow...

I am honored to be here for this man.

He has grown up...Via-sama.

My eyes did not deceive me.

* * *

_**The Memorial**_

**Kira's POV**

Arigatou Mwu-san...I just need some time to think...clearly.

_Tears...and more tears...crying...alone. For a long time I cried...I cried so much. I lost my mother and father and had no idea where my sister was or if she's alive. Just myself. Alone in this dark and empty place. My vision is blurry and my hearing is blurred. But the noise outside has stopped._

_The door is opening, if it's those bad guys, I hope they make me leave. I can't stay here...it's too...sad. A man is standing by the entrance, it's Fllaga-san and Ramius-san, Haha-ue's friends..._

_Am I saved?_

_No..._

_I'll always be alone. _

_There's nobody out there left, haha-ue and chichi-ue are gone..._

I'm crying again...But this time, it's because I finally realize how much of a baka I was.

_"Oniisan! oniisan! oniisan!" I hear Cagalli repeat joyously the first time she found me again, I am glad she is alright. But I can't shake off this sadness, I still feel alone. I made up my mind not to cry anymore..._

_I've cried too much already._

But, I'm okay now...

_Haha-ue_

_"Please live happily..."_

_"I will...always...love you...Kira..."_

I made up my mind not to loathe myself, even if I do feel empty, my friends and family have done there best to make me happy, and I can't forgive myself if I crush their attempts.

Lacus Clyne...

She made me realize this...

Why?

How?

Am I...falling in lo--

Iie...

I shake my head at the thought, my heart does not know of the feeling, does it? And, she couldn't possibly feel the same way too, ne Haha-ue?

Besides, I should be happy for old friend Athrun, he has someone special to spend an eternity with...As if on cue, Tori perches on my soldier. I have to smile at that, Tori has always had perfect timing. Always reliable, just like Athrun, that's why I am happy for Athrun.

"They make quite the couple, ne Tori?"

Oh great, I'm talking to a robotic bird that's settled in my hands now... If I hadn't already talked to gravestones... I'd say I was pretty crazy. I chuckle slightly at that.

Demo, she seems so familiar...

It's not her name...

It's not her beauty...

_"Here my son, please do not become of ill-will. When the time comes, you will know who to give this to." The mother lightly spoke to the boy in her arms whilst handing a whitish silver ring engraved with an incomprehensible writing as well as a bracelet with the same writing. An inconspicuous date was engraved on the inner side of the jewelry. "Always love those who your heart cares about. Always and forever." Touching his small chest to emphasize her point._

It can't be...

* * *


	2. Revelations

**

* * *

**

Anam Cara - Amor Meus

**Chapter 2**

**Revelations**

**

* * *

**

**The next day...Cosmic Era 76. February 2**

"KIRA! Open up the door baka!" A 20 year old blonde woman knocked on the apartment door of her 20 year old twin brother. "I'm breaking through the door now!" She said while raising her foot up high to kick down the opposing aperture. When she was just about to connect full force with the cherry oak material, the door surprisingly swung open causing her to become imbalanced and stumble inside the room. She was about to hit the floor hard until a pair of strong arms gathered her up into an unceremonious hug.

"Ohayou Cagalli." The brunette replied while smiling at her baffled expression.

**Cagalli's POV**

Just as I am about to smash Kira's door in two, it opens swiftly causing me to tip over and lose my footing. _'Damn that floor isn't looking too inviting' I say to myself while closing my eyes to brace for the impact._ An impact that never came surprisingly as I feel someone grab me into a tight embrace and steadying my stance.

When my eyes open up, I notice Kira grinning practically from ear to ear. I eye him carefully, he is too freakishly happy looking today. I wonder if Mwu was right about him being out of control just the night before...

"Who are you?" I reply questioningly while eyeing him half interrogatively and half amused. He's wearing an apron for Pete's sake and smiling like a madman no less.

He mock gasps and places his hand over his mouth, "I'm appalled that you don't even recognize your own brother, sis." He replies sarcastically while grinning even more dumbly.

...What the hell?

I'm so surprised at his actions that it doesn't register in my mind that he led me to the dinner table until I smell the sweet syrup dabbed over the pancakes along with the rest of the breakfast brunch.

"Alright. Who the hell are you and what did you do to that baka?" I reply smugly while eyeing him in confusion. He just chuckles heartily while grabbing a plate for me.

I know he knows how to cook and he's a good cook at that, well practically the Renaissance man where he's good at anything, but it has been awhile since he has ever used all of his skills no less taken the skillet in his hand.

Still eyeing him confusingly while stuffing the food mock angrily in my mouth, he finally regards my question and shrugs it off. Meanwhile, Mwu enters and happily sits down to feast on the breakfast that Kira made so I believe that all is well. I am actually welcoming the change, from how Mwu sounded yesterday, I thought I should have cut that meeting yesterday...But I still wonder, so I don't let my guard down.

After we finish the food, Mwu fills me in the story after Kira made his way to the shower.

I am intrigued and relieved by what Mwu says. Apparently, my brother has gotten out of that self-loathing stage while perhaps finding something that can possibly melt his icy facade. Maybe that's a little too wishful, but I sure hope that happens. I've never seen Kira truly happy, but he deserves so much more. I need to find more about _that_ person...

Just then, baby bro walks out of the bathroom half-naked and I blush a little. What the hell is wrong with me? He's my brother for crying out loud. Still, I have never had a boyfriend or see the male body no less the frame of the ultimate coordinator.

"Mwu-san, please take the day off." Kira basically ordered.

"Eh? But--" Mwu objects while being cut off by Kira.

"I have some personal matters I must attend to Mwu-san. I'll be fine."

"..Okay." Mwu replied, succumbing to Kira's orders while trusting in him.

Kira then walks into his room while Mwu bids me farewell. A few minutes later, he emerges with a slight grin and motions me out the door. I am further surprised to see that he leads me to the McLaren that I bought him the previous Christmas that he hardly used except that one time when I demanded him to. I guess something has happened. I smile happily as the jovial mood commands me to.

**Kira's POV**

I get in the cobalt blue car that Cagalli had bought me seeing as how my errands today will be by far too far to walk.

In my rush, I had forgotten something very important I had ordered for under Mr. Hibiki, which came instantly, and had Mwu discreetly pick it up for me this morning. I sheepishly ask Cagalli to wait for a second in which she gets angry at me for my clumsiness, but nods to let me go. I smile appreciatively as I dash back inside.

**Cagalli's POV**

That clumsy baka. Ultimate coordinator or not, a baka is a baka. I smile at that thought. I'm sure Kira's figured out by now that despite what he is, he is what he is and that's a baka.

I'm not much of a fan for waiting, so I press the push button to start up the car and turn on his stereo system. He's lucky that his choice in music is similar to mine, so I tune up the T.M. Revolution and sing song accordingly. To my surprise, he comes back with what appears to be a small present wrapped around hastily. Men. Still, I wonder who it's for.

He plops back inside with the biggest grin I have ever seen him have. "Here Cagalli. Happy Birthday." He says happily while giving me the small thin box.

"It's not my birthday baka." I reply in mock disappointment, I can't believe he'd gotten me something materialistic because I for one am not that type and often tell him not to do so. On our birthdays or the other usual buy something for your loved one days, he'd usually raise another Freedom World theme park for me and the kids, or given me some other well-though present indirectly to show that he cared and loved me. Which I do know that he does very much, but never anything materialistic for me to hold. Material values aren't everything and though money makes the world go round, love is what makes the world exist. I'm not complaining though, whatever it is, I'm glad he is showing signs of that innocent boy he once was.

Despite all the things that _man_ put him through, he had always remained happy and jovial until that day. I no longer even regard the _man_ that is biologically my father as a father after what he did to my brother, he birthed his life as a scientific experiment for crying out loud! He put him through so much even when he was young, while mother had done all she could to help him. I have to blame that _man_ for what he did to Kira, even though I know that mother's death pushed him nearly too far, it was the gradual deterioration caused by that _man._ I never knew the lengths of what he did to Kira, but I could always see the scars on his body and his eyes whenever he would leave from that_ man's_ care. I didn't need a twin's hunch to know what was happening. And even despite that, he always tried to remain happy, even if it was just a facade through the years I've been with him. He was the only one to ever play with a tomboy like me, and accepted me for who I am, that's why I was so sad and lonely without my brother when that _man _formed the barriers toseparate us.

"Open it Cagalli..." I hear him say ripping me away from my thoughts, I guess he saw what I was thinking and decided to stop me before I got too far. I believe he forgives that _man_ just out of his pureness, but that is something I cannot do.

My eyes begin to focus on the task at hand as I tear through the wrapping easily, seeing as how it was wrapped quite poorly. Men still are men. After unwrapping it, I notice that it's some sort of jewelry from the case it was in. Opening it, I am happily surprised at the delightful sight of something I've always wanted but never dared try to buy, seeing as how it would of been girly of me to do so. Kira probably saw me long for them on the many times he had spent time with me surveying his business, and decided to buy them for me, I'm really happy. It was two identical silver necklaces with a particular green gemstone as the pendant.

"Arigatou Kira." I reply happily.

"It's demantoid because you like green." He said simply while smiling dumbly, I knew he just didn't want to tell me the real reason why I liked this particular jewelry. He was always smarter than he led on.

"But this costs a fortune, and that's a very rare garnet mineral."

"Ah don't worry about it, I am Mr. Hibiki after all." He replies with mock arrogance while he salutes to nobody in particular causing me to chuckle at his antics.

I smile appreciatively and give him a nice suffocating hug. After a few moments, I realize that there's two of them. I put on one of them while offer the other one to Kira, but he indicates to me that it's not for him.

"It's for your boyfriend." He says smugly.

"I don't have one baka!" I reply in mock anger, I knew that Kira only intended for me to get one so I wouldn't have to be forced into that arranged marriage that he knew I really didn't want, but wanted to do it for the sake of Orb...

**Kira's POV**

"Cagalli, do you have work today?" I ask her while snapping her from her thoughts, I guess twins are really alike in that we both can get aloof in another world a lot. I know she was thinking about that arranged marriage, and I really don't want her to get married to that guy Tuna or whatever. He has always tried to pry me away from Cagalli because he didn't know I'm her sister. He tries to make Cagalli do things not of her own will like wear a dress just for his perverted reasons, he doesn't even accept the fact that Cagalli is Cagalli. He's such a coward too, he soils himself whenever I get glare at him, I bet he sleeps with a pillow at night. I can't see him with my sister at all but I know she only wants the best for Orb, but he's not exactly the best for Orb, at least in my opinion. She can do so much better.

"Ah." She replies softly, too softly if you ask me.

"So desu ka," I reply sounding almost sad, but I didn't want her to worry so I put on a cheerful mood and try to change the subject. "Then I'll drop you off, okay?"

She nods while I drive off speedily to the Orb headquarters building. We arrive in no time as several groups of people admiring my blue speeder, I am glad that the windows are tinted.

"Ja Caggy-chan, I'll see you later, k?" I tell her before she goes off, pecking her on the forehead that snapped her out of her thinking. It's been a long time since I've done that but I'm glad to see her change expression as she nods happily while she makes her way inside.

I speed off after seeing her retreating form vanish. As I head off to my second destination, I am nervous for the first time in years.

* * *

**Normal POV**

A brunette nervously made his way into the doorstep of a middle-class two story home. He is greeted by two adults that at first sight, did not believe who they were seeing, but soon after recovered and graciously bid him inside.

**Kira's POV**

"Ohayou gozaimasu, Okaa-san, Otou-san." I say to break the nervous tension. My adopted mother and father happily hug me.

"Where have you been son?" My adopted mother asked me concernedly.

"Gomen Okaa-san...I just had to get my life straightened out..." I reply honestly.

My adopted parents just nod apprehensively.

"Gomen ne...I have been such a spoiled kid." I say clearly, trying to get out the guilt within me for not being appreciative of my adopted parents. They had always treated me as best they could and warmly accepted me. I had just built barriers around them unfairly seeing as how I had felt that my mother was irreplaceable, so I had refused to accept a new set of parents. It just took me awhile to see that my mother would have wanted me to live on, and that even though she's irreplaceable, I should love the family that wants and accepts me for me. Only recently have I seen the genial concern that my new parents have for me and for that, I am very grateful. Biological or adopted, good parents will be good parents and their value is not something to be judged by DNA or material, rather they should judged by the amount of love they exhibit.

I have often tried to give them money to move into a bigger and better house, but they always had refused. It was just another testament to them seeing me as me, I was just too blind in my own misery to ever see it. So before I am too late, I figured I try to bring down my walls for them, just like Haha-ue would want me to.

"Kira...that is not of your own fault, the only fault you've ever had is that you haven't been given the chance to be a kid..." Okaa-san replies with tears brimming into her eyes while she hugs me.

_Haha-ue._

_Arigatou._

**Normal POV**

After a few hours of catching up chit chat, the brunette decided to bid farewell after having made up with his parents. He had also given them, despite Caridad and Haruma's objections, a check for 5 million dollars before he parted for his next destination.

He stopped by the Orb Grocery to buy some snacks for his next destination.

As he arrives at the orphanage that Kira funded by the seaside, he is greeted by a rush of familiar children that tackle him while raiding the goods that he was known to always bring in every one of his visits.

Unbeknownst to him, another visitor had recently dropped by and decided to remain unknown.

**Kira's POV**

I smile at the kids reactions to my presence as they lead me inside to play with them. I am greeted by a familiar family friend.

"Konnichiwa, Kira-san." He says despite his blindness, he had always surprised me of his keen perception.

"Konnichiwa, Malchio-sama." I say to the mysterious but kind man.

He leads me to sit down on one of the chairs as he tells the kids to go off and play for awhile while he attends to my questions. Again, I am surprised at his inhuman senses and directness, but nonetheless relieved a bit to know that I would not have to beat around the bushes.

As the children exit, I begin to worry a little because I feel as though someone else was listening to our conversation. Reverend Malchio smiles at me reassuringly though, gesturing me to speak my mind.

Gathering up my wits and neglecting the feeling, "Malchio-sama, do you think it's time for me to..."

* * *

**Normal POV**

The children were playing on a beautiful day. Many of them had played around with their Oniisan and became very contented and decided to take their afternoon nap. Soon afterwards, Kira decided to go pay a visit to his 'older sister' and bid farewell to the Reverend and as soon as he left, the figure that lurked in the shadows the whole time had emerged.

Reverend Malchio smiled at the person's reappearance, "You are falling for him, are you not?"

**Kira's POV**

_"Where you should go and what you should do will present themselves to you in time."_

Malchio-sama is right.

But I wonder what that feeling was back there. Eh, no matter.

Making my way to Murrue-san's location, I had almost forgotten that it would be kind of dangerous seeing as how her work is, but oh well. I haven't seen her in awhile, I guess I will just surprise her.

**Normal POV**

A gun fight has erupted near one of the secret Blue Cosmos bases. Many lay dead, some wounded. It was a dreaded ambush planned by Zaft's supreme chairman, Patrick Zala. An Orb undercover agent has been injured by a young Zaft special ops member. Fortunately for the Orb agent, the ammunition has ran out for the intruder but nonetheless the soldier charges to attack the wounded agent in close combat.

The Orb agent is surprised by the guest appearance of another youth but familiarizes with the person and is somewhat relieved. The Zaft youth approaches wielding the standard issue soldier knife as the civilian youth tries to help up the agent, the two teens meet in a bewildered gaze.

There eyes finally register the identity of the other as there minds simultaneously yell out the others name while both have the same flashback.

_'Athrun!'_

_'Kira!'_

**Kira's POV**

"Athrun! Is that you?" I ask.

"Kira! Why? Why are you protecting Blue Cosmos?" He asks me.

"She's not Blue Cosmos." I tell him with finality, even though I am still quite surprised at seeing him here. It has been so long since I've seen my best friend. Why is the owner of Infinite Justice Inc. here anyways?

"Nani?"

Gunfire and an explosion erupts before I am able to talk clearly with my old friend. Soon I remember that Murrue-san is wounded so I decide to bring her to my car as Athrun makes his getaway as well.

I drive back towards my apartment because I can treat Murrue-san better there while keeping her name anonymous from the hospitals who would inquire medical records that would blow her line of duty.

**Murrue's POV**

"Kira-kun! What are you doing here?" I ask him, not having seen him in awhile. I am glad that he came when he did though, but I wonder how he knew that Zaft soldier, Athrun was it?

"Never mind that Murrue-san, your wound isn't life threatening so I'm driving you to my house so your cover won't be blown. By the looks of things, the .454 Casull bullet shell only nipped through your scapula without damaging any ligaments so you will be fine as long as you keep the wound suppressed. Wrap this around it tightly." He tells me informatively while giving me a white cloth as a substitute bandage.

I can only comply feebly, my eyes questioning him of how he knew such information so quickly. I knew he was apprehensive and intelligent, but a diagnosis like that is inhuman.

He smiles at me, apparently reading my mind as he just points to his eyes where his violet irises have dilated, _I had almost forgotten that Kira-kun was in a way, inhuman._

_But, did he just smile? He does seem a little happier rather than his usual mellow self. Something must have happened while I hadn't seen him_.

Oh well, there are more urgent matters to discuss.

"Kira-kun, Blue Cosmos have already found out my identity...They had me there for bait, I didn't know but they knew that Zaft was going to attack them so they didn't bother with me. It's even more dangerous then we have thought, they are planning something big!" I tell him urgently.

"Ah. So desu ka." His demeanor is as calm as usual even at the dire news that I've told him. "Then you won't have to work there anymore Murrue-san, it was already dangerous, and you have tried your hardest." He smiles at me genuinely. I am still quite shocked at his demeanor, but I need to press on.

"But my research and data reconnaissance are still back there!"

"I will go get them then." He replies without a care in the world. I think his head has gotten a bit loose since I've met him.

"But, you will be in danger and if you're harmed, then your business will fall and without you and if that falls, Orb will fall as well, along with the rest of the worl--"

"Daijoubu. Murrue-san." He says to me with an invigorating reassurance that demands my faith in him.

"After all, I am the Ultimate Coordinator ne?" He replies back firmly. Without leaving a chance for me to argue.

Ah so desu ka...How could I have forgotten?

We arrive at his place and we are greeted by _him_. He sees that I am injured and takes me away from Kira-kun swiftly after getting the prescribed treatment from him. Not that I can argue much, I must admit that we have gotten close and he seems to take a genuine interest in me...But...

I don't like bodyguards...

* * *

**Normal POV**

The brunette that came zooming by the streets of Onogoro to his destination arrived stealthily at the scene. His special edition McLaren held more tricks than it seemed as it had a cloaking device connected to the brunette's deceiving Rolex watch. Easily, he avoided all the guards and news teams that arrived to investigate the scene by using the confusing chaos. Half of the building that used to be a secret base lay in ruins, decimated from the C4 that crumbled its walls. Making his way discreetly to the remaining portion of the building to find what he needed to find. He was relieved to spot the terminal from which his friend had often times worked at. Gathering the belongings, he proceed to exit as discreetly as he came in.

Driving away from the scene, he felt a jolt of urgency within his soul to get to a particular location. As if by natural reaction, his body took over as his hands moved to turn the wheel to that place. The boy had reached the beach alongside the coast where a particular orphanage was settled. Looking by the beach, he noticed a distinct and familiar figure that laid unconscious on the sand.

**Kira's POV**

That unmistakably unique pink hair. There's only one person who has that kind of hair.

Carefully, I run towards the protruding figure in the sand. I do not know for sure who it is, but something inside me tells me otherwise. When I reach the body, I am then proven correct.

Baka-na...

It's _her _again...

It's Lacus Clyne.

Kuso...she's unconscious, though she's still breathing. I look up at the dark sky, and I notice that it's going to rain hard pretty soon. The salt water invading the beach has dampened her light pink locks and casual white dress. The drenched dress clings to her body snugly, accentuating her voluptuously perfect figure. Her sumptuous buttocks showing ever so erotically without even trying, while her firm and round breas--Kuso! What the fuck am I thinking?

This is no time to be getting perverted and taking advantage of such an innocent angel like this. Get it together Kira! You've seen more cleavage thrown at you by those money grubbing whores for Pete's sake!

But she's different, she seems so familiar and I vaguely remember...a long time ago...an important event...but it seems as if I cannot exactly tell what it is or remember that scene clearly...Besides, the past is the past and going back into the past is impossible.

She's so sweet and pure, she smells like fresh strawberries mixed with lilac and a hint of vanil--Whoa, whoa, whoa! Just hold the fucking phone there, how the hell do you know that?

Enough of this shit, she's getting married, to your best friend who probably wants to kill you for 'helping Blue Cosmos' no less.

I take off light windbreaker I was fortunate enough to be wearing and wrap it around around her. But not before I could get a better view of her...assets...though. _'Dammit, I'm goina need a long icy cold bath after this' I say to myself as I delicately pick her up._

She stirs a little and surprises me by snuggling tighter to me, which just adds more time for me to spend in the bathtub with ice cubes while eating an ice cream and frolicking with penguins...Ah yes, frolicking with penguins.

I place her gently inside my cobalt colored car and tearing my hungry gaze away from her...assets, I start up the car and roar my way through the streets towards my apartment. I hope Murrue-san and Mwu-san aren't there and finally decided to get together, it's obvious to see that there's something between them. Besides, I wouldn't want them to think I just kidnapped the famous songstress, heir to the richest company in the universe that is the Clyne Faction, and daughter of the Supreme Plant Chairman Siegel Clyne, right? Right?

As I near my destination...One thought that I have seemed to overlooked prevailed through my mind.

Holy shi--

* * *

**Kira's POV**

Miraculously, I get in my apartment without anyone noticing the woman in my arms. I place the fallen angel (When the hell did I become a romantic sap?) on my couch as I contemplate on what to do next. Maybe have my fun with her or something, I smile wickedly--...Of course, I would never do such a thing, especially with her, nope that was out of the question.

Feeling the need to stop all my newly found pervertedness, I begin to walk to my bathroom to take that icy bath. Suddenly, Lacus-san shifts uncomfortably and I realize why. I mentally smack myself once again for overlooking the fact that her clothes were soaked. I know I have to attend to her though, so I begin to prudently make my way to her side.

Then I finally realize that _somebody_ has to change her before she catches a cold from her damp clothes. I try to come up with possible suspects to do the 'horribly terrific' deed, and I panic for the first time in years.

Murrue-san? Iie...She'd discipline me if she found out I took a soaking wet girl to my home.

Okaa-san? Iie...She'd be displeased if she found out.

Cagalli? Iie...She'd kill me if she found out.

Much to my dismay, she sneezes from the her damp clothes, snapping me from my musings. Just as I feared/relished?

It would be up to me.

Now, I do not know how I will manage, but I hope I can...I've never backed out of any responsibilities in my life, and I'm not about to start now.

So, I get up and head to my drawer to find the smallest t-shirt I can find along with the smallest pajamas I have and proceed to do the deed.

I can only pray that her underwear is still dry.

May the divine spirits guide me if they are not.

I bring her head closer to me in a sitting posture so that her dress will slip off smoother. As I tug the dress over her shoulders, I can feel her chilled silky skin. I gulp at the sight of her half naked form, wearing lacy pink bras and a matching pink--Argh damnit, penguins...penguins...Antartica...penguins...penguins...I quickly place my medium size t-shirt to cover her upper body while thanking the spirits for their mercy of her having dry undergarments.

She shudders in the cold and latches on to me more firmly, trying to gather warmth from my heated body. Of course, I have no arguments for my plight.

I gather my remaining control and put on the pajamas to cover her lower body.

Sighing in relief, I am glad to not have taken her right then and there. I smile at her awe striking cute sleeping form as I lift her up to take her into my room and place her in my bed (Not that I would do anything). Gently laying her on my king-sized bed, I pull up the covers for her so that she can warm up a little more. Seeing her sigh in content, I try to break free from her grasp in order to get that well-deserved, but well needed icy cold bath.

Before I can leave, she pulls me back gently as if she didn't want to let go. Something inside me is happy at her actions but I knew spending more time in here would just increase the risks.

More firmly this time, I pull away from her hands while a smile frown dances on her all-natural and luscious lips--Argh! Quickly, I pull up her covers until her frown turns into a neutral stance and I begin to make my way towards the shower room. Where I will probably be spending the night, after something like this, but hopefully not or else my skin would get too wrinkly.

Reaching the showers, I think about all the penguins. I know it's childish, but hey, if it helps, than why not do it? Stripping of my lightly wet clothes, I turn the shower full blast on cold. I fight a losing battle against the sleep that rushed through my veins as I drift off in wonderland in no time, the easiest time I have ever fallen to sleep since...since Haha-ue was around.

* * *

**Normal POV**

Two young adults had drifted off to a wonderful sleep that night. Each satisfied in their respective places. While they were off dozing, the two youths were unaware of the fact that they shared the same flashback, hidden in the deepest of depths beneath their conscious minds.

_The beautiful dawning sky was accentuated by the fluorescent streaks of mellow turquoise in the forested park. Almost all, but two of the children were laughing and playing. One was gifted with chocolate brown hair, while the other had a strikingly odd color of light pink. One was crying their eyes out, while the other watched in sincerity. One was filled with gloom and despair, while the other was filled with worry and concern._

_It was a beautiful day regardless of the sadness seeping out from the brown haired child. Yes, it was a beautiful day indeed, on the risen earth that formed the grounds they treaded on. The little pink haired girl, with worry overriding her unfamiliarity with the grieving brown haired boy, approached the child carefully._

_A tiny pale hand was placed on the lamenting boy's shoulder, snapping him from his intrinsic battle with the sadness that threatened to consume him. A small reassuring smile curving on her lips had captured the full attention of him. He gasped at the alluring beauty of innocence that the girl had emanated. A part of his soul relaxed by the mere touch of his 'guardian angel'._

_To him, she was beautiful, even at a young age of eight where cooties plagued the minds of almost every boy, except him. With her, he felt at peace, despite the tragic events that traumatized his young mind that had recently happened._

_He was snapped from his trance with the girl, as a couple of young bullies approached causing an uneasiness in his guardian angel._

_"Heh heh, look at that girl, isn't she so uggggly?" sneered one boy, but that did not even faze the angel. 'She's strong...' the brown haired boy thought._

_"Yeeaa, she's got pink hair, how weird is that?" snickered another boy, this time the girl had twitched in annoyance a little._

_"Hey you kid, why don't you play with us, that little ugly girl is goina give you ugly cooties," added another, causing tears to brim to the shy girl's eyes. _

_She hadn't had much confidence in herself. Her long wavy pink hair wasn't actually desirable, in fact it was particularly weird in the eyes of many. She was often picked on by many children who were unaware of the fact that she was the daughter of the Supreme Chairman of Plant, Siegel Clyne. She often cursed herself for having been born naturally with the unusual hair color, and now, she had thought she was going to lose possibly what could of been her first true friend that was not given to her by her father. How wrong she was..._

_"Iie." The boy said firmly, surprising those within earshot._

_"Nani?" The 'leader' of the group said, just as bewildered as the little girl._

_"Iie. My angel is not ugly!" Roared the boy louder so that he would not have to repeat himself again. The little girl beside him blushed a rouge pink, flattered by what the brown haired boy said. 'Angel? I'm not ugly?' she asked herself._

_"Haha! Your hear that guys? Lover boy here says that this ugly girl here isn't ugly!" The leader said comically while grasping the girl's pink hair to the comic relief of his crew. The girl squeaked in pain, it had hurt to be called ugly, but it had hurt worse when her hair was pulled. _

_"Let go of her!" The boy said in a protective yet firm voice._

_"What are you goina do about it, Mommy's boy?" The leader mocked while tightening his grip on the girl's hair. She yelped a little louder from the obvious physical pain she was suffering._

_Within an instant, the brown haired boy snapped from the terrible insult, as two jewel-like Seeds, one of violet hue while the other a dark ebony burst into tiny fragments in his mind. His newly enhanced awareness and surpassed peaked physical ability that bestowed upon him heightened reflexes and blazingly quick information processing allowed him to use God-like speed to knock out the leader with one blow. He had never felt the rush to protect like this before, but the girl was already something important to him. The leader, beaten with one blow, released his vice-grip on the girl's hair as he trembled in fear when he gazed upon the darkened eyes of the enraged boy._

_With one swift move, the boy threw the leader to the equally surprised and equally scared bullies, of whom, two had abruptly used the toilet in their pants. The side effect of the darkened state of the boy had caused his rash mind to declare wickedly, "You have 5 seconds." Crunching his knuckles to show the remaining conscious children what exactly he had planned to do. Consequently, the children all scrambled for dear life, crying and wailing while they scurried away._

_The still enraged boy was going to chase and hunt down the thugs until a pair of arms encircled him in an embrace. Turning around, he found two baby blue hues peering up at him worriedly. His dark eyes not even fazing the brave little soul that clung onto his. After a while, the boy returned to normal and whispered apologetically, "Gomen nasai..."_

_The girl had inadvertently let the tears that brimmed her eyes fall down. They were tears of relief believe it or not. The tears were then subverted by a small but firm and calloused hand, irregular for a child his age, but yet gentle on her velvety skin. His touch was unusually alluring to her, she could describe the strength and the warmth radiating in them. After a few more moments, the two reluctantly broke the embrace._

_"A-ano..." the brown haired boy stuttered, regaining his shyness at the beautiful girl's presence. "You're not ugly..." He said plainly, as his mind could not register something more...romantic._

_The girl had relinquished the frown she had and traded it for a neutral expression, with obvious insecurity still evident in her pretty blue eyes. The years of being picked on took its damaging toll on her confidence, however, the boy could see right through her soul and saw the unconfidence inside of her, much like how the girl saw right through his soul to find the piece of humanity in him._

_"You're beautiful, angel." He said more assuredly this time, surprising the girl while a pink blush arose on her cheeks, almost the same pigment as her hair. The boy found it to be extraordinarily cute as he blushed and sheepishly looked away._

_"Arigatou." She said, more jovially with building confidence inside her from knowing the boy was being honest._

_Soon afterwards, the boy realized he had a small gift that he had bought for his mother. Unfortunately, the boy was not given the chance to give the gift away. He had bought it with the money he gathered in his own pink piggy bank just for his mommy, and seeing as how he had no use for it other than bringing back painful memories, he decided to hand it over to someone who could use it._

_"Ano...Here...I think you're hair is very pretty." The boy said sheepishly, placing the golden double crescent shaped hair clip in her hair. The girl brightened with a newly found unbreakable confidence at the thoughtfulness and sincerity of the boy and gave him a very happy hug that lasted for over half an hour. The two just liked the feel of being in each other's arms as time flew by. She was sad that she hadn't had anything to give back, but the boy assured her that her friendship and happiness was more than enough._

_The marvelously delicate moment was abruptly ended with a very dismal important information he had momentarily forgotten. He was set to move that day, move away to Copernicus after being adopted...Dreadfully, he told his angel of the news that clearly hurt the girl to know that her first true friend had to leave the day she found him._

_Tears fell down her eyes again, rare tears that she had hardly shed even for a girl of her age, something about the boy moving just cut her to the core and laid her bare and fragile. Perhaps it was his sincerity and kindness that attracted her like a moth to a flame, but whatever it was, she did not want him to leave. Her tears were swiftly wiped away by that same gentle hand once again, and she looked up to see him smiling a smile that was directed only for her, begging her to not weep for him._

_She asked softly while tilting her head down, "We can meet again, right?"_

_Raising her chin up with his curled index finger and thumb to meet his violet gaze, he simply whispered audibly, "Hai." Her light blue eyes danced in happiness at his affirmation, she hugged him with pure mirth for several minutes. The two were shrouded in a blissful silence, enjoying the other's presence greatly._

_With the sun coming down, the boy than began to part ways. Before he left, he felt a very funny feeling in his chest. He remembered twelve words he had recently heard and affected him greatly._

_"When the time comes, you will know who to give this to."_

_He knew right then and there, that it was that time and the person in front of him was that person. He had pulled out a box, where one of the two of his most precious belongings lay safely stashed away. He pulled out the whitish silver ring, which caused a jovial squeak from the girl. He tried to put the ring around her finger, but unfortunately it was too small. The girl saddened a bit, wishing her fingers grew that instant until the boy handed the velvet raven box to her tiny pale hands._

_The little girl grinned from ear to ear with joy written all over her soul, and surprisingly kissed him with all she had. The boy was surprised at first but then decided to kiss back much to her delight. The affectionate kiss was broken a few minutes later, and both were mutually glad to have given the other their first kiss._

_He smiled and bid her a farewell as his ride had arrived. She smiled and bid a 'see you later' as her father had arrived, the man was oblivious to what had happened, but nonetheless happy to see his daughter in such a happy mood that he longed to see her be in._

_As time passed, the young girl began to lose the precious memory she had thought she would always remember as she steadily grew into a bodacious woman. It was understandable to forget, even such a memorable moment, but she had always wondered of what the promise was whenever she would look at the promise ring she held on her finger. It was her reminder that she was forgetting something or someone, that was very important to her soul's happiness. Soon, her memories eventually simmered out, being replaced with being betrothed to a handsome emerald eyed boy along with the duties she had to undertake._

_As time passed, the young boy unfortunately did not grow up with fond memories nor a happy transition into young adulthood. His dreadful past ever so insistent on replacing his few happy and precious memories with horribly realistic nightmares. Even his reality became painful as he realized his unwanted separation with his beloved sister, loss of his mother and father, and the science experiment that was his birth. The empty and melancholy feeling prevailed throughout his life ever since. Though, he had recalled missing a treasured sister jewelry to a particular jewelry he had always kept safely stashed away. _

_However, the passage of time is ever unrelentless though as it has never ceased to stop, always carrying the flow of everyone and everything ever known._

* * *

Waking up from his deep slumber, the brunette known as Kira faintly recalled the events of yesterday, missing out on the important parts such as the lady that lay in his bedroom. He just remembered he had to get dressed while forgetting the fact that his clothes were in the room where he placed the girl. He mentally slapped himself for forgetting another important matter, which was having clothes in the bathroom and falling asleep in there no less. His skin surprisingly wasn't wrinkly though, _'Must be the Ultimate Coordinator thing' he thought sarcastically._

Drying himself off and wrapping the blue towel around his waste, he made his unsuspecting way over to the 'scene of the crime'. Upon entering the room, he was shocked to see a protruding bundle sticking on his bed. It was then that he fully remembered the whole escapade with Lacus-san and he began to turn around to leave until the said woman turned around.

Caught dead in his tracks, Kira froze in terror.

**Kira's POV**

Kuso!

What will she think? I hope she doesn't think I raped her or anything, even though that would have been nice--errr what the hell...I mean...I didn't. Yea, I didn't.

I then realize that her eyes are still closed...

For freaking out like that, I slap myself physically this time...but as I look at her insanely cute angelic sleeping face, I am dragged over like a moth to hell. Dammit, who is she to make me like this? I'm not like this...Not at all and it can't work...she's engaged to Athrun remember?

Nearing her, I once again succumb to that feeling of wanting to be near her. It's as if my efforts are futile, but I need to try at least...A few strands of her hair drop in front of her nose and I am all but forced to gently swipe it away and tuck it behind her ear. I sigh dreamily, wishing I had someone like this as my wife...--

_'Oh hell no I just didn't think that...'_

'Oh yes you did.'

_'You can't be serious.'_

'You can't be serious.'

When did I have two consciences?

Deep in my own thoughts, I fail to notice that a pair of light blue eyes are gazing questioningly at me.

Then, I hear the most melodious morning voice ever to snap me back to reality and greet me in the wee hours of the day.

"Ohayou gozaimasu."

* * *

**(A/N) Gomen ne for the cliffhanger? I like this story more than my other one right now, but I don't know when I can get the updates up. They might just come sporadically for either one, whenever I get interested or inspired I guess. It might not come in awhile though, I unfortunately have a week-long trip to attend to. (hehe, sarcasm there) Anyways, hope you guys liked this chapter.**

**Ja ne**


	3. Here With You

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Anam Cara - Amor Meus

**Chapter 3**

**Here With You **

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"Ohayou gozaimasu." The pink haired princess said ever so lightly with her angelic voice.

With his cheeks reddening every millisecond that passed by, the brown haired youth began to panic as his mind berated him for his folly. His mouth trying to form the words that was scrambled in his mind, thus slurring his thoughts that could not properly formulate coherent speech.

He was caught red-handed staring at the woman of his dreams, quite literally as she was the one who he dreamt of the night before. The close proximity he had unconsciously situated himself in only added to the heated blush that engulfed his features.

He wondered how long the girl had been staring at him while he drifted away to his other world. He wondered how she would react being in his bed, while he was half naked. He wondered how he would persuade her that he did not try anything the night before. All of his wondering was in vain though.

* * *

The heavy eyelids of the baby blue beryl-eyed woman had drearily shut just as soon as they had opened. Fatigue still ruling over her softly matured body. Her chest undulating mildly as her softened features demanded the admiration and envy of many. The soft gentle breeze intruding from the ajar window began to sway the loose strands of her roseate colored hair.

The amethyst eyed youth finally broke free from the panicked state of mind and let out an audible sigh of relief. After regrouping his wits, he found it extremely difficult to tear his gaze away from the sleeping beauty that lay dormant on his bed.

Remembering his lack of clothing, he swiftly made his way to the drawer to fetch out the first attire that he sees. Heading towards the door quietly, he could not help himself from sneaking another glance at the maiden resting on his bed. His violaceous gaze admired her surreally adorable sleeping form.

The slight sight of cleavage from the oversize t-shirt that slipped from her shoulders added a touch of undeniable sensuality. His mind fought through another torrent of emotions,_ 'She is the most arousing thing I have ever seen in my life...'_

_'What the hell am I saying? It's just her shoulder for God's sake!'_

He noticed a small chilly shiver that interrupted the woman sleeping in his bed, and by instinct, he immediately walked back to her side to lift the covers higher up to wrap her in warmth. After doing so, a genuine satisfied smile crept up on his lips as he once again uncontrollably delved into the depths of her mesmerizing beauty.

A few strands of her hair fell once more, due to a peculiar missing accessory, in front of her nose as he instinctively swiped the obtrusive locks carefully and tucked them away behind her ear gingerly. Unknowingly, he began caressing her hair gently, unknowingly stirring a pleasant feeling within the sleeping beauty. She conveyed her pleasure by showing smiling genially causing the boy's smile to broaden.

After what seemed like an eon, it took much of his will to stop his dreamy admiration and ministrations of proclivity towards the pink haired princess. He tore away his attention on her and hurriedly made his exit. Closing the cherry oak door gently, he leaned into the aperture and sighed in relief for managing to escape.

He knew clearly that the more and more he got attached to her, he was just adding to the height of his terrible fall that would inevitably ensue him. Regardless, he knew he was powerless against the beauty and loving warmth that radiated from the pores of that woman. He knew fairly well that he was fighting a losing battle. A battle he so desperately just wanted the outcome of a draw, though he knew it was futile to think so.

Without even trying her allure exerted a gravitational pull on him that could not be escaped naturally, as was a basic concept of physics. Except her equatorial gravity was equal to Jupiter's 2.358 gee.

After putting on the clothes he fished out, he considerately went to check on her dress that he hand washed and had dry cleaned by one of his--previously thought to be useless-- machine that he invented the previous night before. His thoughtful intellect telling him that she would need her own clothes soon, not that he minded that she was wearing his clothes.  
It gave him a kind of pride he was aghast at, seeing as how he hardly took pride in anything that he has done. The girl was a well of surprises that constantly caught the boy off guard. He shook the thoughts out of his mind and proceeded to prepare the dress nicely, and place it where she could easily spot it on top of his dresser. He neatly placed the simple yet elegant pearly white dress on the cherry oak furniture, and placed the golden double crescent clip above it, like a cherry on top of a double hot fudge banana split sundae.

Finished with 'his' responsibilities, he proceeded to clear his mind of everything the only way he knew how. Making sure his apartment door was locked after his exit, he went over to his garden patch where he tended to many rare flowers. Only this time around, he unknowingly picked a few sweetbrier roses--which unconsciously reminded him of something he thought very beautiful--and proceeded to make his way to his place of solitude. Upon reaching the area, he placed the pink colored flowers on the headstone and casted his typical prayer as his eyes shut in commemoration.

The area was hidden from common view on a hill overlooking the horizon of the beach. The beauty of the granite was it's reflection of nature, and even the ones who gazed at it for an inconceivable amount of time--namely a violet eyed youth. However, this place, just like his existence, was a blessing and a curse. It engraved the memories of the kindness in her mothering, yet it marked the pain of her passing. He was born with a heart of kindness, but one that always hurts. Recklessly endanger himself, while putting others first. The scars that ran deep seemingly could never be quenched, for it was not as simple as just thirst.

He convinced himself that even the presence of the beautiful woman had sadly only covered the innards of his true inner turmoil. Though his unforgivable past was forgotten for an instant when he was with her and he felt true happiness momentarily, the misery surged back into his bones ten fold as dark memories resurfaced in his mind. He blamed himself once more, as he was not allowed to forget. His very existence reminded him of this. The simple and undeniable fact was because he existed, people have died.

Almost instinctively, he set refuge from another source after bidding his mother farewell. His legs led him to the beach shore, where he was free to gaze at the beauty of nature. An inexplicably beautiful clash of yellow orange with bluish green marked the line of the horizon. The waters that recessed and progressed caused a gentle rhythmic noise that brought peace to all those who stopped to listen to nature. His eyes snapped shut to relish the sounds of peace, almost coercing a bit of amity to pour into his self. He became lost in a world of nothing once more, this was the only peace available to him.

With his senses dulled by the commotion that racked his mind, he never realized a pair of eyes that stared at him intently during his trip to another world. The eyes were watching with a distinct sense of intriguing admiration while the boy just remained one with nature. An ethereal serenity pervaded his true entity, he faintly felt the hand that guided his soul. It was his kindred spirit coaxing his troubles in an attempt to dissipate them like he had never felt before, though he did not truly know and even reprimanded himself for actually believing in such a thing, in his heart of hearts he knew that _that_ someone was out there. For him, waiting patiently, only truly loving him in the way he so wanted to be loved. So lost was he in his attempt to unravel such a mystery, that he failed to notice the pair of baby blue orbs approaching him closer and closer.

It was inexplicable.

Then it happened. A gentle hand placed on his shoulder ever so softly had brought the boy back to reality. Beryl collided with amethyst. Violet collided with cerulean. Both gazes stirred within themselves a tempest of innumerous emotions that were inexpressable by words and limited to only the vision that only the other could see.

There was one thought that predominated their minds.

They were falling.

* * *

**Violet-eyed POV**

_'Nani?'_

There's a hand on my shoulder...It's warm and soft...like a roll of Angel soft toilet paper...I wonder who's it is...It's almost as if it's calling me back...wondering...questioning...as if it's wanting to understand...who would want to understand? What can be understood? Can it be understood?

Demo...

It feels familiar...

I turn to see the owner of this hand, and to my questionably delightful surprise.

_"So beautiful..." my mind whispers._

The light dab of pink that rouged her already alluring face had finally registered in my mind that my mouth had inadvertently whispered her name. She twiddled her fingers together in an adorable motion,_ 'basically just about anything she does would have to be described as cute...' I hope she didn't hear that..._Much to my dismay, she blushes even more than before. Then, I begin to question myself if I really had said such things...Then I remembered her unconscious on the beach, and curiosity gets the best of me.

"Are you okay?" I ask, surprisingly in more worry seeped out then I had intended.

"Hai."

"Ah so desu...ano, what were you doing by the beach?"

A flash of worry dashes her features for a moment and I instantly regret my curiousity. Before I could take back my question.

"Was there anybody else by me?"

I get unusually jealous from what she said, but afterwards I reprimand myself for feeling such an emotion just by her innocent words. _'What's wrong with me?' I ask no one in particular._

"Iie...There was just a small amount of blood on your clothes..."

After finally remembering that she had a body to go along with her ever mesmerizing eyes and perfectly shaped face, I finally realize that she was not wearing her pretty white dress. _'Hmm, that's interesting...' I say to myself._ Usually, all the girls I have ever met or had to spend time with, with the exception of Cagalli and Haha-ue, had always, always, always tried to look more beautiful and neglected ordinary and casual clothing.

Being once again surprised, I realize that yet another thing made this woman so special...she was not afraid to not look her best. I also realize that she had never worn any form of lip gloss or blush or any artificial (and overrated) 'beautifying' supplements. It was inconceivable how alluringly beautiful she was despite only being au naturel.

"So desu ka..." She said as her worry dissipated slightly. "There were people who were yelling 'for a blue and natural world' who attacked the Silver Wind ship that I was on, but the crew and my bodyguard had me evacuated safely...I wonder if they're okay..."

"So desu...daijoubu, I had not seen any wreckages or anything of the sort." I say trying to comfort her. "And there are people... who don't like Coordinators so... demo..." I am again surprised at yet another admirable trait of hers, she's a very selfless one...It wouldn't have surprised me if she wanted to stay on that ship even if she is a pop icon...

"How sad... but you are very kind. Thank you." She says genially, breaking me from my analytical reverie. Her blush had completely vanished and was replaced with a sweetly innocent and genuine smile, what more was that it was directed at me...I feel a small blush stain my cheeks, hm, that hardly happens...It's just that beautiful smile of hers is so...

Iie...

I need to stop this foolishness...

I can't keep going like this.

"B... because I'm a Coordinator too." I say trying to cast my reasoning for helping. Guilt wells in me because I only added that part in my pathetic attempt to prevent myself from continuing this...this...whatever this is.

"But you are kind because you are yourself, right?" She says in that enchanting voice of hers. I am stupefied at her amazing perception...it's as if she _can_ see right through my soul and know who I am, without having spent one day with me... That smile again...

"Could I please have your name?" She asks innocently.

I am surprised again, I had forgotten that she did not even know my name. I scratch my the side of my head dumbly, which she seems to not even mind.

"I'm Kira, Kira Yamato."

Then another surprisingly admirable trait of hers emerges... her unparallel level of politeness regardless of her noblesse and her (well-deserved, might I add) fame.

"Arigatou, Kira-sama."

Realization strikes me like a bag of thunderbolts from the heavens.

_I can't keep going like this._

But I cannot stop.

* * *

**Somewhere in a secret Zaft base...**

A flat screen computer showed some very interesting news to an emerald-eyed youth.

News Reporter: "The ship heading towards Junius Seven for the preparation of the memorial group dispatch, the Silver Wind, disappeared last night. I repeat. The ship heading towards Mendel Colony for the preparation of the memorial group dispatch, the Silver Wind, disappeared last night."

"Lacus..."

* * *

**Lacus' POV**

I have never seen or met anyone like Kira-sama...

I can see so many painful emotions as clear as day in his eyes, all of which he tries to hide. Though his effort to him seems that his deception is evident with those cold eyes of his, in just its appearance was very scary...but behind the mask there was kindness, strength and an unbearable amoun of sadness.

But...why is it so clear to me?

It is true, that I understand so much even though I don't like to say it...

But...why is it, that what I don't understand the most, is why I understand him the most?

Perhaps I do know...I just can't admit it to myself...yet...can he?

**Kira's POV**

I have never seen or met anyone like _her_...

I can see so many emotions in her eyes, all of which she tries to hide. Though I can see right through her clear as day... As if I truly understand...

But...why is it so clear to me?

Why is it, that what I don't understand the most, is why I understand her the most?

Perhaps I do know...But I can't...Can I?

_'Can I?'_

**Normal POV**

The two young adults spent quite a vast amount of time together. The day was beginning to break before they even realized that their piercing gaze had bore holes into the other, wordlessly. Physical expressions, both of the body and the tongue, could not express what they were feeling. They themselves could not express what they were feeling. The setting sun quietly melted into the vast ocean, slightly dabbing the azure seas with subtle streaks of sage. The effect of the background, though trivial to the two, surrounded them with an unearthly radiance.

Only several minutes after half the sun was engulfed by the sea, the boy realized that his guest would of course be hungry. Finding the sense of urgency, he used it to his advantage as he broke the woman from her thoughts by speaking.

"Would you like to eat?" He asked tentatively.

After returning to reality, she answered merrily, "Yes, I would like that."

Almost instantaneously, he motioned with his hand to follow him into his apartment.

In his attempt to be a good host, he cooked up the finest meal he had ever made in his life. Of course, he didn't know why he felt like he had to, but he just did anyways. The dinner went uneventful other than the joyful squeals of tasting such exquisite cooking, though she had plenty of gourmet meals as a pop idol, the boy's cooking by far surpassed any of the 5-star meals. A zestful barrage of compliments became routine from her, as a slight blush and show of modesty became routine for him. Often, the vision of the other's face intrigued the pair more than the food itself. Soon after, the food had completely disappeared and feeling the need to ease the awkward tension that lingered in the air, the young lady decided to take a shower.

Asking politely before she went about her business, the young man knew he could not refuse her. No matter how small or big the request was, he knew he still lacked the heart to say no. Guiding her to the shower room, she exchanged a genial pleasantry with the boy who could only reply dumbly. Closing the door lightly, she began to go about her business, shedding off her oversized clothes while folding them neatly, she swiftly climbed into the wash tub while turning the water on. The swift chilly mist that sprayed all over her bare body caused an involuntary squeal of surprise in her. Adjusting to the stream of water, she fell into her usual habit of singing merrily behind the curtains.

Before perverted thoughts invaded his mind, he decided to take a leisurely stroll around the vicinity. He couldn't help but hesitate to leave after hearing a delicate voice singing an all too familiar song beyond the door. The trickle of water seemingly orchestrating a makeshift music that was trickily perfected by the angelic voice. Years of torment drifted away from the boy just at the simple heed of her soothing voice. To him, it was as if each and every word was dedicated to him in some way, coercing him to get better. But he knew better than to think such things, before too much pondering could be done, the youth swiftly made his exit.

Once again, he relied on his legs to take him where he need be. Once again, it led him to the gravestone. Once again, the flood of memories overwhelmed him, but this time... the pain had unusually dulled...

* * *

Meanwhile, the drenched pink haired princess finished showering and proceeded to exit. Unfortunately, she noticed that an important piece of fabric was missing on the small towel rack. It seemed that the violet-eyed man had forgotten to stock on towels much to _her_ embarrassment.

"My, my..." she said to herself.

Chancing her exposed body, she made a dash to the bedroom she had awakened in. Much to her relief, there was no violet-eyed gaze that aimed at her way. She had felt him leave, though she balked at the thought of feeling such a thing, she knew she was right. She quickly searched the room for a towel stark-naked while her damp pink hair shared its wetness with the soft carpet. She found a pile of neatly folded towels and took two to dry herself, wrapping her body instinctively with one towel, while taking another smaller towel to dry and wrap her hair with.

Her aquamarine eyes searched the room again, finding her neatly folded casual dress. She had probably lost her ceremonial dress, but it did not matter to her what she wore for memorials, she knew the most important thing of all was the prayers and commemoration. Despite growing up in an ideal environment, she was blessed with a kind and understanding heart.

She was a real woman...

She was a surreal woman...

She was Lacus Clyne.

* * *

**Lacus' POV**

I had never really took the time to look at Kira-sama's room. Seeing that opportunity present itself right now, I noticed that he only has a few personal touches amongst the commonality of his room. Though it is unusually tidy for a boy, I knew there is something peculiar about this room. A small and simple framed picture sat on his desk, crying out for my attention. Presumably, it was his mother holding two cute little babies, the brunette haired one being Kira and the other blonde would perhaps be his twin. The woman was very happy and very beautiful..._'I can see where Kira-sama got his looks from'_...I bite my lip at the thought. She did resemble her son very much though. Her light chocolate hair and the same violaceous eyes showed her euphoric joy and loving emotions without any hindrance.

_'She must have been a good mother...'_

Upon closer inspection, I realize a clean cursive handwriting of an important memoir on the lower left hand corner.

_Haha-ue._

_Ai shiteru._

_Always and forever._

Now I see partly why his eyes always seem so sad. I wondered how lonely he must be feeling, it must be painful. I know for a fact that those eyes hid so much more. Surprisingly, I am intrigued to find out. It was as if my soul was always crying to him, with him, for him. I wanted to console him, to help him and to be with him because deep down I knew I was the only one who truly could. My eyes search the room even more thoroughly than before in an effort to find more clues until my gaze lands on his dresser.

I notice that one of his drawers are slightly opened with a peculiar white object evident within its confines. Curiosity getting the better of me, I decide to open the drawer to see what it is. To my surprise, it was a 20 terabyte hi-def iPod. I am already guilty of snooping around his room...I hope he doesn't mind. Against my better judgment, something inside me forced me to turn it on and look at its contents.

What I see in it surprises me very much...

But it filled me with a certain inexplicable joy...

I had never experienced such a feeling in myself before.

Before I fell deeper into my reverie and I decided to place the object back in its place.

I let my legs take me to him.

* * *

**Normal POV**

The distinct signs of the quiet night darkened the vast sky. Enveloping everything in a sapphire fluorescence, the small freckles of light dotted the heavens. A smooth and comforting breeze threw about brown hair lightly, while tossing around long pink tresses mildly. A tiny smile of satisfaction curving the lips of both figures, seemingly entwining a bond both strong yet unapprehensible.

**Lacus' POV**

I find him standing what seems to be a memorial. _Just as I thought... 'It's his mother's...'_ Nevertheless, it was one of those beautiful yet sad places. Overlooking the horizon as a peaceful protector of all. An aura of peace mixed with an aura of sadness filled the atmosphere of this reverie.

Noticing a distinct feature, I smile at the sight of my favorite flowers that lie beside the headstone; sweetbrier roses.

I approach him quietly.

Soon, having him in arms distance, my hands move on their own to snap him out of his sad thoughts. I cup his violet eyes gently and smile as soon as I feel his facial muscles shape into a slight smile.

The moment he turned around and looked at me with those beautiful violet eyes, I gasp at the sight.

For a moment, I felt he was truly happy.

But what frightens me is that, for a moment, I was truly happy.

**Kira's POV**

I had thought about so much...

I almost became lost again, but something drags me back.

I smile instinctively at _this_ feeling.

My vision goes black for a moment.

My sad memories brushed aside by soft, warm, and loving hands.

I know this touch.

When I turned around, I found a beautiful sight.

"Do you want me togo home?" I ask her before I had a chance to gawk dumbly at her.

She bit her lip adorably, trying to find a well-thought out reply.She was hesitating for good reasons.

"Ano, I can take you back to Plant if you want..." Ioffer half-genially whiletrying to mask the sadness in my own words, in my heart of hearts, I washoping she would not want to. _'But that is what she should do,'_ I say to reassure myself.

However, I knew that...

I did not want her to go...

"Iie..." she says softly, I am a bit relieved but her tone did not dissolve my uncertainty completely. That is until her beautiful baby blue eyes, of which differed in hues by the sapphire night's incandescence.

My mind almost inconceivably registers what I faintly believe to have been her thoughts.

_'I want to be somewhere I am needed...'_

_'Here with you...'_

I balk at my thoughts... there was no way she could have thought that...

Could she?

* * *

**Lacus' POV**

_'I want to be somewhere I am needed...'_

_'Here with you...'_

That is what my entire being told me. I needed to be here. For him. He's so alone but it is not out of pity that I choose to stay here. It is something else. Something that I do not know...yet.

He nods in acceptance. _'He sure knows how to listen...'_ But I wonder if he listens too much...It felt as if his mind was inextricably connected to mine...

My train of thought is derailed by a warm and gentle hand that clasps mine. He gently leads me towards the beach as he slowed down to walk by his side.

Something I find so much peace when it's like this.

_Just like this..._

I wish it could remain like this forever...

_Just like this..._

I wish I can be here with him...

_Just like this..._

But...

_Can I be here with you?_

* * *

**(A/N) Arigatou gozaimasu to all those who reviewed this story, it really adds an extra incentive for me to write and update quicker. I am flattered that you like the story so far. Hoped you guys enjoyed it, no cliffhanger this time either. This one took a little longer than usual because it's very hard to get in the mind set of Kira and Lacus when they talk to each other, their platonic love is so hard to convey in words but I tried my best since I wanted to capture the true essence of their character so I took more time with it, plus school is not really helping...Notice that they're not necessarily head over heels or purely lustful for each other...Even though i want them too, don't you? I wanted to develop intricacies of their relationship though...heh. Love is patient. I know this wasn't really action packed or anything, but heh. Just be on the lookout for the next chapter...Hehe.**

**  
Ja ne**


	4. The Scars That Run Deep

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* * *

(A/N) Arigatou gozaimasu to all who read this story. Domo arigatou for the reviews as well, they have really pushed me to keep writing. Sorry for taking a while...Enjoy.

* * *

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**Anam Cara - Amor Meus**

**Chapter 4**

**The Scars That Run Deep **

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* * *

**

In the quiet night...there was peace between two figures, both lost in the depths of their minds. A sparkling sapphire fluorescence encased the sandy shore and its hues reflected off the surface of the restless seas. The sleeping sky lighted up more than the already innumerous amount of glowing dots that marked the vast night of the heavens. The breeze picked up faster winds laced with a cool rush of moisture. Apathetic about what it touches, the scintillating winds grazed anything and everything.

After dark, the ever increasing algid winds caused a slight shiver to rupture from a pink-haired princess. On instinct, the brown-haired Coordinator decided to call it a night and return to the warmths of his shelter. They walked to within the grounds of the complex, but were greeted by a certain blonde and brunette, both of which were very surprised at seeing the pink-haired girl.

A rare amused smile formed on the brown haired boy's face as he casually strolled up to the surprised pair.

"So, I take it you two are getting along, eh Mwu-san and Murrue-san?"

* * *

**Mwu's POV**

"Ah, kid." I say proudly, I can't help but smirk at the slight blush covering Murrue.

"Kira-kun...uh, iie...it's not what it looks like." she says trying to cover it up. I sigh, I know she likes me, but she always tries to cover it up all the time. I can't compete with that dead boyfriend of hers, but she needs to get over the past... Because I love her eh? Though I would like to tell her, I'm fine with just being with her, and in time she will be ready.

"So kid..." I say with a smirk, successful at turning the tides. My obvious gaze falling on the girl that saved Kira the other day. I am quite surprised seeing him with a another person, no less a woman who he's holding hands with. I know her from somewhere...I just can't put my finger on it. My gesture brings a light blush to spread across his face--whoa never seen that happened before.

"Ano, this is Lacus Clyne." He says shyly while the she offers a hand in friendship. Murrue and I gladly accept, happy at seeing Kira with a nice woman.

"Ah, that's who I thought you were! You're that famous Plant songstress!" Murrue says surprisingly, covering her mouth showing her shock.

The pink-haired princess just nods in apprehension.

Lacus Clyne, the famous songstress eh?

That's interesting...

**Kira's POV**

"So Murrue-san, what are you doing here this late with Mwu-san?" I ask causing another blush to stain Murrue-san's face. Mwu-san and I are amused at her response.

She stutters in trying to come up with a response to cover it up. I decide to let her off the hook for now.

"Well in any case, it's chilly out. Would you guys like to head in for a drink maybe?" I say.

"Iie, maybe some other time, I've got to go." Murrue says while Mwu-san's hand reaches out to stop her from going. His cobalt blue eyes pleading her to stay with him.

"Okay. We're going to head inside now. You should stay with Mwu-san, it's getting pretty dark out." I say to Murrue-san.

She's a little indecisive at first, until Mwu nods affirmatively and begins to lead her into his apartment. I know what's holding her back from being with Mwu-san. I walk up to put a hand on Murrue-san's shoulder, this is a good a time as any to intervene a little.

"Murrue-san..." I start questioningly.

"Hai, Kira-kun?"

"Mwu-san's not my bodyguard."

Murrue-san is surprised at what I said, while Mwu-san smiles in comprehension.

"W-what?" she asks hesitantly.

"Mwu was never really my bodyguard, he has just always been my friend."

With that said, I head to my apartment, leaving a baffled brunette and a grinning blonde.

* * *

**Normal POV**

The rest of the night went fairly uneventful for the couple, a comfortable silence adrift in the air. Neither one wanting to break a seemingly unmeaningful silence, though in reality to them, it was a silence that spoke volumes. For one is not limited in communication through only the voice or the body alone.

The pair ate a late night snack, watched some television, and even popped in 21st century chick flick about two young lovers and some notebook and what not. The brunette was very much interested, but didn't want to show it. Certain aspects of the movie was just tearing him apart such as the girl having to marry another guy, though she loved another...Often times he would unwillingly draw parallels between himself and the movie, especially the many times he had chanced a glance at the beautiful pink haired girl sitting beside him on his comfy couch.

He would wage internal wars with his newly found twin conscience as he attempted to shake off the thoughts.

_'The one big difference is that she doesn't love me...' he often said to himself._

_-'Baka. You don't know that...'_

_'You're a baka. She's getting married stuuupid.'_

_-'If I'm a baka, then you're a baka. Baka. One can still love another stuuuuupid.'_

_'Well...Well, that's because it's a movie stuuuuuuuupid.'_

And so on and so on.

Despite an internal warfare, the Hi-Def 50 inch plasma TV with surround sound managed to draw him in the movie a little more. Boys will be boys. He had also wished that he opted for some scary or action flick instead in order to further close the distance between them, but being a good host he decided to let her pick the movie. He figured any movie would do because he would still get his chances to snatch a few looks. A male egotistical way of resisting feebly the fact that he could not deny her anything she would want.

A familiar ring resonated from the brunette's Golden Orb cellular phone, another gift from Cagalli. Glad to be diverted momentarily from the movie, the boy eagerly answered the phone who he knew to be Mwu.

"Moshi moshi Mwu-san." Kira said casually.

"Hey kid, I just wanted to say that--that what you said earlier today was a nice way of saying 'You're fired.'" Mwu scoffed comically feigning hurt, though he was really pleased.

"Do itashimashite." Kira responded nonchalantly while hanging up the phone, he was very used to Mwu's comical ways and knew that he knew that he was just playing because he knew that Mwu was just playing. Mwu was ecstatic at seeing Kira the way he was, he knew Kira was healing even if it was just bit by bit. Mwu wanted to tell Kira something very important to him, but he knew only when or if Kira fully healed and was deemed responsible enough would he ever receive this important piece of information.

Back Kira's apartment, the brunette resumed to be absorbed by the movie, but he was rather absorbed by the beauty sitting next to him. He would often take sneak peeks out of the corners of his eyes. Though soon after, Kira's glances always turned into staring and admiring the pink-haired goddess from afar. Her unique pink locks cascading down her sides while her hands were tightly clasped together. Tears were brimming her eyes as she was wholly captivated in the movie. Her adorable face was scrunched up a bit as the light from the TV brightened her baby blue eyes. Her voluptuous lips were parted ever so slightly while her elegance was multiplied by the simple white dress she adorned. Her long silky smooth legs showed off nicely with her manicured little toes and rouge nail polished fingers.

She sure was a sight to see that the boy often thought he was just imagining her being there with him. It was still unreal to him that when he realized she was there, and throughout the whole movie he basically paid more attention to her rather than the movie. For she was rather a constant reminder of something he wanted and needed so badly, yet could never have. One particular moment from the movie tore through his resolve...

"I am nothing special; just a common man with common thoughts, and I've led a common life. There are no monuments dedicated to me and my name will soon be forgotten. But in one respect I have succeeded as gloriously as anyone who's ever lived: I've loved another with all my heart and soul; and to me, this has always been enough."

Oh how he wished he was just that. A "common man with common thoughts"... He knew well that he was no common man, and in now way did he ever lead a common life. He had never truly loved someone with all his heart and soul... But it always seemed like if the answer was right in his face. He couldn't think those thoughts though, he knew he built walls around himself and even though she managed to seep right through them, he still had his secrets. She didn't even know who he really was for crying out loud.

All the while, that secondary conscience tried desperately to remind him that it would not really matter to her. However, he still didn't know whether or not to tell her about him and his secrets, he had wanted to, but he felt as if he could not do such a thing. For in doing so, he would have ultimately taking the ill-fated plunge that he knew he was barely preventing himself from doing. In the past, he never told nor ever wanted to tell anybody the deepest and darkest parts of his secret, not his close friends, not his best friend, and not even his sister.

However, in just a short amount of time, he felt compelled to tell her everything. He felt as if she would be able to fill that void in his life, though she already did to a certain extent. He wanted to relinquish his resistance from taking that jump so badly, the pain was almost palpable. Besides, there was something else important that was holding him back from completely doing so. The main reason he could not do so was the engagement ring on her left ring finger that reminded him ever so painfully. She was Athrun Zala's wife to be, she was Lacus Clyne.

Just the mere thought of it pricked his eyes to tears, tears that he could never shed. If he were to, he would surely concede to the desire within him and forfeit taking account their feelings for the other. _'I keep forgetting that she loves Athrun...'_ That was the thought to defeat his nagging double conscience. _'But why did she want to stay with me?' The last bit of hope from the defeated conscience always brought up softly._ He shook away the thoughts though while is mind recently remembered an article he casually read about the pop star.

Today was February 3rd.

Two days before her birthday.

Something deep inside the brunette had badly wanted to give the girl a nice gift. His mind tried relentlessly to come up with a possible gift. It was an impossible task though, his mind kept reiterating one though in general: _'What do you give a woman who has everything?'_

_'She had beauty beyond natural existence._

_She had more money than he could ever add more._

_She had fame that he could never ascertain._

_And she had a handsome, intelligent, and reliable husband to be._

_What could a guy like Kira possibly give her that she could not get herself or already have?_

_Especially when he himself felt so empty and meaningless._

_He was the one that needed her._

_She did not need him._

_Right?_

_She was the beautiful, innocent, and perfect girl._

_He was the experiment, monster, and Ultimate Coordinator._

_She was caring and loving._

_He was careless and loveless._

_She was the songstress that touched the lives of millions through her songs._

_He was the...'_

His mind trailed off because his fragile yet strong heart could not take the pain any longer. The tears he so valiantly held back seemed to be gaining the upper advantage. It was then that he noticed the movie had ended, and the distance between the pair had significantly decreased. Lacus was laying in Kira's lap, which he had was pleased yet startled by such proximity. She was so soft, so gentle, and smelled so good. It was as if she was instinctively compelled to coerce him, every time he was troubled she was always there, even before the recent events. In his mind, and in some way or form, he felt as if she was always there.

Kira then decided he should just come out with it and began to try to shed off the burden of his secrets saying, "Ano...Lacus-sama, watashi wa..." He trailed off realizing that the pink-haired princess was fast asleep with a satisfied smile playing about on her luscious lips. Kira let out a deep sigh, a bit frustrated at not being able to tell her yet relieved that he didn't. He knew he wasn't really ready to tell her, and it almost seemed like she went to sleep so that he didn't have to. That was not possible though, was it? Before he would be drowned by his thoughts, he decided to move the woman to his bed so she could have a better sleep.

Gingerly picking her up bridal style, he proceeded in getting her to the bedroom. She was no problem carrying around since she hardly weighed 50 kgs and besides the fact that it was the Ultimate Coordinator carrying her. When he carefully plopped her down on top of the mattress, she instinctively refused to be physically parted from her source of warmth. However, Kira could not think such a thought as he covered her with comforter that seemed to ease her. When he stepped back, he was caught in that familiar entrapment of gazing at the resting goddess in his bed.

_'She's so beautiful...' _

_'I'm not goina be able to get some sleep like this, am I?'_

Kira sighed in defeat and pulled up his computer chair.

_'At least I can be comfortable...' he thought to himself comically. 'When did I have such a humor again?'_

_-'Since you met her...'_

_'...Not you again...'_

_-'At least I'm being honest here...'_

_'What are you trying to say?'_

_-'What you need to say...'_

_'She's getting married to my best friend.'_

_-'That's not it and you know full well it isn't.'_

_'Than what is it?'_

_-'You just want to be with her...'_

_'What do you want from me!'_

_-'What you want for yourself. To be by her side.'_

_'That's impossible...you know as well as I do...stop making it harder for us.'_

That familiar internal warfare reared its ugly head again. This time around though, he was definitely losing as the salted moisture seemed to magically materialize once more. His promise to no longer cry was the only thing keeping the tears at bay. He kept his longing gaze concentrated on the pink-haired goddess.

_'I can't tell her...'_

Another startling event occurred, almost on instinct, the said woman shifted position and turned over facing away from Kira. He knew that was more than instinct, it was an obvious sign that reminded him that she was off limits as long as he kept that wall that only he could bring down. He was guilty. Guilty of having to hide his true self from her, and everyone else he cared about. It pained him more than anything to see her turn away from him, even if she was in her sleep and didn't mean to. Metaphorically, it was a harsh reality check of his unforgiving past.

Sorrowful tears finally broke out from his violet eyes, each stream silently cascading down his handsome face.

"Gomen nasai Lacus-sama..." He said softly, his mind settling on telling her while she was resting. It was the only thing he thought of that could subside the pain in his heart that he has always had to feel throughout the years. Bottling up every emotion inside of him, refusing to release his musings because he always thought it would be selfish to. To put it simply, he didn't want others to worry about him. That's who Kira Yamato was, though he never realized it, he was the most kindhearted person to ever take a breath of oxygen. He was very forgiving, never staying within a mind set of hatred for others for more than an hour. In fact, he was the one who he hated most of the time, regardless of what he has done. He never felt he had done anything positive, it was just the type of guy he was.

Through his guilt for keeping his secrets so long, he knew that this woman was the one who he thought deserved to know the most, yet deserved to not to be told the most. She would worry too much, that was a fact to him that he knew from the moment he saw those baby blue eyes of her. They were her most alluring physical feature, the innocence and strength from within the depths of her genial eyes. Telling her in the quiet night would be enough to ease his conscience.

Softly yet audibly, he began to take the plunge..._"Lacus-sama...WA tashi wa, Ultimate Coordinator..."_

Kira spent much of the night talking his heart out to the sleeping girl. He fell into a teary-eyed slumber at around 6 a.m. abruptly ending his last sentence that he wanted to say to the girl so much, yet could never find it in his heart to tell her awake or not. With exhaustion creeping into his bones, he finally succumbed to the need of sleep as he softly uttered his last and final incomplete thought, _"Gomen nasai Lacus-sama...I wish I could tell you how much I... I..."_

Caught up by exhaustion and extra dreariness from his first time in revealing everything to a living, but sleeping person, little did he notice that he was not the only one to be shedding tears that quiet night.

* * *

Figuring out that the brunette was finally asleep, Lacus turned around to check on the boy with tears brimming in her baby blue eyes. Carefully observing the boy, she knew he was in a horrible sleeping position that would probably give him a painful back cramp in the morning. His head was tilted down almost as if in dismay for his deed while his arms droopily fell towards the floor. His tousled brown hair remained tousled while his chest gave rhythmic heaved up and down signaling his breathing pattern.

Turning to more pressing issues, Lacus never felt so much sadness in her life. She had just heard him confess the deepest and darkest parts of his life. She had felt guilty at not being able to tell him that she was awake for the duration of his confession. She had felt guilty for not having been able to be there for him because deservedly needed somebody to help him. But the thing she felt guilty the most about was not being able to tell him how meaningful his life really was.

She now knew the answer to the biggest question she ever had. Why was the boy always so empty and sad? The answer was all too obvious. In his mind, he believed that he was unforgivable. She was practically more amazed that he had actually turned out as a void of nothingness. Anyone with a right sense of mind who went through things the way he had to would probably be insane or murderous. She knew why he didn't though, the kindness in his heart and soul prevented him from doing so. In that sense, he was the perfect being.

_'So that's how the life of the Ultimate Coordinator actually went...'_ she wondered aloud in her mind. Being the prestigious daughter of Supreme Chairman Siegel Clyne, she had often haphazardly heard the legendary fables of the perfect being, the Ultimate Coordinator. When word had gotten out, she remembered the many outrages violent riots against Coordinators that spattered about on Earth. The masses were eased by consoling fables about how the ultimate being ceased to exist after being slain by naturals (typical Blue Cosmos propaganda) while others implied that all coordinators were ultimate beings (typical Zaft propaganda). Though 'peace' reigned throughout the human world, behind the scenes was another matter. The unsubdueable ignorance, desire and darkness inside the human heart was the real ruler of the world as people so often fall into the wishes of hatred, thus creating themselves the very reasons evil exists.

Yet, there was hope. The promise of a future, so distant yet familiar. Lacus made a quick note of a tingling feeling inside of her as she turned to aid the boy into a better sleep. Caressing his cheek softly, she was surprised at how remarkably strong his jaw features were yet soft like her hand. She pulled and led him onto the bed beside her as he gave no protest in switching to a better position. He was on his side facing Lacus, of whom took advantage of her better vantage point of seeing his features. Drying tears marked his face as his eyelashes still had a bit of residue staining them. His mouth was slightly parted while his hand moved under his cheek as a pillow to sleep on, similar to a child. Lacus giggled at his cute position, he was sleeping rather comfortably and only when he was sleeping did she get a chance to check out his worry less features for the first time ever.

Needless to say, she was caught in a similar entrapment of admiring the man. He was rather handsome with his cheekbones perfectly aligned and proportionate body structure. She memorized and visualized his mesmerizing amethyst eyes so deep and filled with a superfluous amount of emotions swirling violently around each and every passing moment. She would and could look into his violaceous eyes for days on end. Yearning to feel him again, Lacus hand acted on its own accord by lovingly massaging his temple, which surprisingly to her, on immediate touch a few traces of wrinkles disappeared.

A few minutes from her actions, the boy began to stir. As he soon became more wildly in his movement, she realized it was not because of her that was causing such

an incommodious feeling. He was having a nightmare. The brunette was mildly thrashing about while uttering coherent and incoherent words. He would often mutter, "Haha-ue" and "love" and "Lacus-sama." Frightened for his sake, Lacus snuggled close to Kira and embraced him tightly which immediately relieved the brunette. After a few moments, the brunette completely settled down while repeating his previous words. Lacus shook off his words though as she could not conclusively draw what he had completely said, nor did she have the right to assess something when the boy was just having a nightmare.

The close proximity was awkward yet very comfortable. Lacus had an even closer look at the boy she tenderly wrapped in a warm embrace and cooed him back to a peaceful sleep. _'He must have many of these nightmares...' she thought sadly. _She noticed that there was a fresh new trail of tears cascading down his eyes. The complete remembrance of his heart aching words flashed through her mind again. She remembered every word of what he said...but some parts troubled her more than others...

* * *

**Lacus Flashback of what Kira said...(Partly--not everything)**

_"Growing up, I was content and ignorant of my birth... I had my family and I loved them very much... But I had always wondered why father would take me away from everyone and train me..."_

_"I always thought he just wanted me to become stronger... It was not until later when I turned eight when I began to learn what I really am."_

_"I was very weak and childish. He was right... Haha-ue died because I could not protect her. She died because of me."_

**Kira's POV Flashback**

_"Give me my son back!"_

_'I hear Haha-ue yell out to Chichi-ue... I was behind the door that was slightly ajar, was she talking about me?'_

_"He's MY son! He is the Ultimate Coordinator, I no longer need you or that natural daughter of yours!" Chichi-ue answered just as loud._

_'I asked myself what's an Ultimate Coordinator?'_

_"Iie! The Ultimate Coordinator? Will that bring him happiness? That boy is kindhearted and loves this family very much. He is no different from anyone else, he has not evolved into another specie, ultimate coordinator or not, he's still our baby!" Haha-ue cried out._

_'I could see Haha-ue crying...was she crying because of me?'_

_"Foolish woman, mankind has always strived to surpass itself. Because there is happiness in being better!" Chichi-ue yelled back so loudly. _

'I could no longer listen...I had no clue what he was talking about. After Chichi-ue slapped Haha-ue, I got really mad at him... Why would he slap mommy? Why would he hurt her when I hurt her? Why!'

_"Chichi-ue! What's the meaning of this? Why are you hurting Haha-ue? Why?" I say though I was really scared, I was more confused..._

_'Why is this happening?'_

_"Hmph. Do not become tainted by that woman my son. Come here, now!" Chichi-ue commands me, but..._

_'But what woman? This is Haha-ue... Why would I leave her when she's crying?'_

_"Get away from her! Now! She's nothing but a woman! You are the Ultimate Coordinator! You are MY son!" Chichi-ue yelled._

_'Iie... I love Haha-ue, she always takes care of me and makes me feel better when I cry. What's an Ultimate Coordinator?'_

_"After all I've done for you. You are coming with me."_

_'Iie! You've done nothing but hurt Haha-ue... I won't let you anymore!'_

_"Iie." 'I hear myself say, was that me who said that? It didn't sound like me... Was it that Ultimate Coordinator?'_

_"Nani? Kisama! Ungrateful chikusoume!" Chichi-ue yelled at me with his fist getting ready to hit me until..._

_**BOOOM!**_

_'Are they trying to kill us? Why is Haha-ue hugging me? Did I not make her cry? What's happening?'_

_'Where's she taking me?'_

_'Iie... Is this blood? So much blood... Am I dying?'_

_I gasp at what I see when I look down... 'This is not my blood...'_

_'Haha-ue! Is she dying? Iie! I should be dying... Iie!'_

_"Here my son, please do not become of ill-will. When the time comes, you will know who to give this to."_

_'Nani? What's this...? What is Haha-ue saying?'_

_"Always love those who your heart cares about. Always and forever."_

_'I love you Haha-ue! Don't leave me... Please, I won't cry anymore.'_

_My mouth wouldn't open as she touched my chest._

_'Is she leaving me?'_

_"Please live happily..."_

_'Iie...Iie! Haha-ue!'_

_"I will...always...love you...Kira..."_

**End of Kira's POV Flashback**

* * *

**Lacus Flashback**

_"Ai shiteru."_

_"Haha-ue."_

_"Always and Forever."_

_"I cried...and cried...and cried. I think I cried for about 2 days straight until someone had found me. He said that some people were wanting to take me in and that I would have to leave Mendel Colony. He gave me time knowing that I would not take it too lightly having to move away, from the place of all my memories with my family... After wandering around whimpering and weeping, I remember someone else had found me. I don't know where I just got this recent memory from... I thought I had forgotten it... But all I remember is that she was my angel."_

_"I know that's not true, but I would like to think that..."_

_"I had moved away from her the day I think I saw her...If I ever did, I don't know...I still don't remember that well..."_

_"What I do remember is that I was also missing another part of me... I only found that part when I was 16, but I'm glad... That had just been about the only thing good that ever happened to me... When I was nine, I was separated from my adopted parents when we moved to Copernicus... They had gone somewhere to Heliopolis in search of my sibling so I told them I would be fine living alone. They knew I needed time alone..."_

_"Copernicus, that's where I met your husband to be..."_

He trailed off even more softly. There was a long pause as he seemed to be thinking very deeply and keeping to himself for the most part. After a while, he started again in that same tone as before.

_"He's a great guy...though I'm sure you know already... I was best of friends with him so I can assure you he will treat you kindly. He's kind, strong, and very reliable. He often helped me out, I remember there was a "Micro Units" project when we was studying and he basically did that for me. He was my tutor and I was really proud when he was top in class when we were 14 years old. He's probably drop dead handsome, he was chased by many girls in Copernicus, but he's very loyal so you wouldn't have to worry him being unfaithful to you."_

Kira chuckled happily at that, though inside he was destroying himself, he was used to it. He wouldn't get in the way of the two no matter how much he wanted her. He would never tell her that. His secondary conscience told him to stop thinking such disheartening thoughts, but it could not stop him from doing so. There was just some things that could not be helped. He could only bare the pain by saying that it could not be helped, which he had been continuing for almost all his life. There was nothing that could heal those wounds deeply embedded inside of him, and the more he tried to get closer to this girl, the deeper the wound would go inside of him. He knew that, it was common sense.

_"I spent a lot of time with Athrun, but I never told him because I didn't want him about me which I am guilty for not opening up. I just didn't want him to get caught up in my troubles that's all... His father was bad enough... Besides, I would have gotten him in trouble because I often stole food from school and other restaurants... I was never caught though. I was sad when he had to leave... His father called him back to Zaft. But he gave me Tori so I was happy."_

Kira would leave out the sad fact that they had not kept in touch. Kira had attempted many a times to contact Athrun, but it seemed he was always busy, which dispirited Kira. He gave Athrun the benefit of the doubt though, saying that Athrun was busy running a corporation, even though Kira himself was running a corporation as well... He wouldn't say anything that would even have the chance of jeopardizing their marriage, even if she was sleeping.

Sometime during his passionate revelation, his mind decided that he would no longer try to be with the woman, no matter how much he wanted to. No matter how much he needed to. No matter even if he just wanted to be by her side... He had succumbed to the fact that it would only serve to slowly or quickly kill his already dying heart. He had just wanted to simply reveal his unforgivable past to her in an effort to ease himself, so he was already selfish in a sense...but he was not that selfish. Athrun and Lacus were a perfect pair.

He also left out the fact that the only reason Kira needed help from Athrun was because he was in a world of misery though he never showed it to him, nor did he told him that he knew a lot more than he showed. He was also careful to avoid revealing the fact that he was the 'infamous' Mr. Hibiki.

_"When I had to leave Copernicus, I was about fifteen years old I think. When they were doing customs at the spaceport at the moon city, they had unknowingly reminded me off one of my most precious valuable that Haha-ue gave me... It was then I realized that I had not known what Haha-ue and Chichi-ue were arguing about."_

_"Ultimate Coordinator they said..."_

_"I was very hesitant, but I knew I just had to find out so I went back to Mendel Colony..."_

_"It turned out the house my family and I used to live in was abandoned and never touched. It was air locked and sealed away by someone and only a fingerprint and DNA scan from my family's bloodline could unseal it. When I walked in everything was ruined...all my fond memories vanished and were replaced by the reek of death in the place. There was faint evidence that told me the place had been scoured before... Regardless, I explored much of the devastation and..."_

He started to waver in his speech as fresh tears pricked his eyes. With strong fortitude and determination, he continued to finish what he started...

_"And I found out what the Ultimate Coordinator was... There was a research laboratory underneath our house... There was many... many dead bodies and unfinished zygotes... Chichi-ue had created me... My life was a whole lie... My life was just a scientific experiment... That's why... My life is meaningless..."_

_"I wanted to leave that place immediately, there was no tears in my eyes. I had nothing. I was a broken empty shell. Realization had struck me that what Chichi-ue had me do was for himself... I was nothing more than an achievement. I forgive him though... I am actually sorry that I had not turned out the way he wanted me to turn out. The Ultimate Coordinator project was not a success."_

_"I began to make my way until my legs led me to a familiarly peculiar room... I found out that it was that forlornly room that we were in that fateful day. I checked its surroundings and I saw a picture of Haha-ue holding two babies... I recalled several memories of Haha-ue, and I remembered that I had a copy of this picture in my room, but when I checked that place, there was no sign of it... I didn't know at first who the other baby she was carrying was, but I felt that whoever it was, was another part of me. I decided to take the picture as a keepsake, matter of fact, this picture right here is that picture."_

Kira said half-jovially while picking up the picture and pointing at it though he thought the girl was asleep. He talked to a gravestone, a robotic bird, so why not a sleeping girl? He put the picture down carefully and took a second to admire her form again. Then he went back to business, seeing as how the girl was still turned around so he thought he wasn't out of the clearing yet.

_"After pocketing the picture... My feet led me to the secret place where Haha-ue took me... What I found tore my heart in two. Though I am an empty shell, it still tore my heart in two. I saw Haha-ue lying on the ground... her blood was in the same places I had recalled and it seemed like she was left untouched... It took several minutes before I could approach her resting form... I was surprised at how perfectly preserved she was, despite turning paler than normal, she was still my beautiful Haha-ue..."_

_"I had decided to carry her, and I would take her to Orb, where I had originally intended to move to. Seeing as how it was close to Mendel Colony."_

_"I would have buried her some place nice, but all I had was this apartment. So I buried her here for now... Though she is dead, she will remain alive in my heart forever. Haha-ue told me something very important... Something I will never forget... Gomen nasai Lacus-sama... I wish I could tell you how much I... I..."_

**End of Flashback**

_'Tell me what Kira?' Lacus asked herself, she wanted so desperately to know what he wanted to tell her. _Exhaustion from waking up from her slumber and listening patiently to the troubled boy was slowly but surely overcome the pink haired princess. She was still in a tight embrace with the boy, with there faces only several inches apart. Feeling a sense of warmth and protection emanating from the brunette, the pink-haired woman freely let sleep envelope her. Each person enjoyed the most peaceful sleep they had ever had in their lives. The brunette soon stirred awoke from his peaceful slumber and was both surprised and elated at his position with the pink-haired goddess.

* * *

After a few moments, it finally registered in Kira's mind that he was sleeping on the same bed as the pink-haired goddess. He began to panic at whatever actions he may have taken the night before, but upon seeing her clothes still on her, he sighed in relief. Then he remembered how he was confessing to her while she was asleep. He was deeply saddened by not being able to tell her when she was awake, but was also a bit relieved. He couldn't recall everything he had said, he just knew by the end he was crying. He figured he must have fell over from the chair that night, but he did note that he had the best sleep of his life the night before.

Kira tried feebly attempted to embed that feeling deep into his memory, but he knew that this blissful moment would not last. He also remembered his vow to keep his promise to prevent himself from trying to be with her. Sighing heavily, he reluctantly began to move away from the girl while taking precaution to not awaken her. It was a difficult task indeed, the task that was difficult was not trying to keep her asleep, it was for Kira to release her embrace. After about half an hour of caution and mainly reluctance, he managed to slip away from her entanglement. A few of her pink locks had fallen over her face to which Kira naturally (and used to it by now) gently brushed away.

He was caught in another one of those longing gazes as he was once again mesmerized by her beauty. No matter how many times he would see her, he knew that every time she would always be able to mesmerize him effortlessly. He shook his head violently this time, beckoning such thoughts away fruitlessly. After much struggle, he made a motion to get a hold of her husband to be as he desperately needed to get away from the woman. Kira remembered he left his phone on the couch so more than gladly he used it as an excuse to part ways from the pink-haired goddess. Before he left, he had to suppress a potent need to peck her on the cheek for such a peaceful slumber. Unable to fully subside the urge, he managed to divert enough of it to give her a chaste peck on her forehead as he scuffled out of the room for dear life.

He knew he could not last much longer under these circumstances. He was so powerfully attracted to her, mind, body, and soul, for if not having received such a rigorous life, he would have completely fallen head over heels...Not that he had not already... He sighed deeply again as he tried to change the subject by focusing on the task at hand. Kira made his way to the couch and as soon as his hand went out to fish the device, a familiar rhythmic tone resonated throughout the room. It came from the cell phone, a feeling from his heart betraying his need to answer the call.

Ignoring the ominous warning, he picked up the call and minutes after listening to a familiar yet unusually glum voice on the other line, the device abruptly fell from his shaking hands...

_**To be continued...**_

* * *

**(A/N) Gomen nasai for the cliff...heh. And gomen if that was a little hard to read... Just imagine typing that flashback within a flashback... heh. lol. Plus the structure and order was kind of difficult...Hope you guys liked it though. Eh, I was wondering if I should I have shorter chapters? If anybody has any tips or suggestions, I would really appreciate it. Sorry for any spelling errors or mistakes... I don't usually check my work until a day or so later...hehe.**

**Ja ne**


	5. Tears of the Night

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* * *

(A/N) Arigatou gozaimasu to all of you who read and reviewed. Feel free to drop any sort of comment by, I appreciate anything I get and will most likely respond to those who have any questions or suggestions or critiques or what not. Hope you like...

* * *

**

**Anam Cara - Amor Meus**

**Chapter 5**

**Tears of the Night

* * *

**

_Kira made his way to the couch and as soon as his hand went out to fish the device, a familiar rhythmic tone resonated throughout the room. It came from his cell phone, a feeling from his heart betraying his need to answer the call. Ignoring the ominous warning, he picked up the call and minutes after listening to a familiar yet unusually glum voice on the other line, the device abruptly fell from his shaking hands..._

_

* * *

_

Lacus was distraught that very morning as she made it very clear to Mwu that she was obviously worried on the behalf of a particular brunette Coordinator. Mwu cocked an eyebrow in interest to her demeanor while trying to fill her in from the recent events.

Mwu, Murrue and Lacus were heading over to their destination in a bit of a frantic hurry. Mwu was the only one out of the three who was informed briefly of the situation that happened and as luck was on his side, he tried in vain to suppress the irritating though charming amount of worry exuding from two women that obviously cared deeply for the young man. Needless to say, inside Mwu's 4-door BMW X36 circulated an air of worry that not only overflowed from the women, but from Mwu himself. Mwu tried his best to conceal and suppress his own worried emotion in an effort to lessen the degree of the women's constant inquiring. After awhile, the nagging surprisingly subsided as Mwu returned his focus on getting to the place quickly and in one piece, while Lacus reminisced about the event that worried her beyond belief.

**Lacus' Flashback POV**

_I woke up with a rather perturbing phone call that seemed so ominous at a time when moments ago, I had just felt an extrinsic euphoria that seeped inwardly. In normal days, I would have slept through such raucous with ease as I had been accustomed to such, but this particular phone call seemed to draw me towards it unceasingly. Rubbing the slumber out of my eyes, I protestingly arose from the comfortable bed and headed towards the source of my vivification._

_Exiting the room casually, I realize that the source of my euphoria was up and about. Secretly, I admire his form that was draped with so many mysteries and and underlaying amount of concealed strength._

_A few moments later, I notice that his strong figure began trembling inconceivably as he dropped the offending phone from his hand. I note that he is distressed by something... but what exactly distressed him, I do not know... All I know is that he needs help, and instinctively, my feet starts after his direction. Before I could reach him, he turns around abruptly and what I see frightens me not for my own safety, but rather... for his safety._

_His warm violaceous eyes turned into those frozen tundra hues, the same ones as the first time I saw him... What's more disturbing is the amount of sadness stirring in his eyes..._

_"Kira-sama..."_

**End of Flashback**

* * *

_beep...beep...beep..._

In a room barely lit came a meek voice attempting to reach out its desired audience. A small beeping sound emitted in long intervals, signaling a forlorn event quickly approaching. A young man was by the side of the source of the voice, his caring devotion did not allow him to downcast his head to show his frailty. Instead, his hand tightly grasp the hand of the origin of his sadness. His eyes laced with the last amount of caring and tenderness he could muster at that point not for his own sake.

Another young woman slumped her posture timidly placing her arching back on the jamb of the door. Unlike the young man, her emotions poured out of her pores and fell onto the floor while her fists were clenched in a fruitless effort to subside the pain, sadness and worry. Worry drowned her almost as much as her tears had done. She was worried about the well-being of the boy...

A few more seconds passed as the beeping sound converted into a single sound that reverberated throughout the room melancholy. The moment that the flat line sound emitted from the ECG heart monitor, a pair of disbelieving violet eyes glared at the offending machine, almost willing it to play another sound. But sadly in his heart, he knew that was not possible as he felt the small hand in his hands seemingly lose all traces of its remaining warmth. Reluctantly, the man solemnly placed the small hand over the ceased heart.

Turning away, not a single ounce of emotion could be found in his eyes, there was nothing...absolutely nothing.

* * *

"Mwu La Flaga!" Mwu says sternly while flashing his identification to the receptionists and guards in Orb Hospital. Quickly scampering away to a coordinated direction, Mwu made sure to thank the gods that he carried his id with him at all times.

Aftewards, he motioned for Lacus and Murrue to follow him. He was glad he knew his way around the hospital or else they would have had to waste some more time. The trio made a mad dash for a particular room that Mwu had completely forgotten about during his happy times with Murrue.

He cursed himself for having forgotten such knowledge that the time for such a forlorn visit would soon arise, but never had he known that that time would come so early. Remembering the halls of the fine and well-kept hospital, Mwu guided the two ladies to a room in which he knew something bad was happen--It was Conille-chan's room...

Nearing their destination, they stammered into a quick stop noticing two figures emerge from the dimly lit room. A brunette started for the way in which the three came, but was abruptly stopped by a blonde woman slightly shorter than the brunette himself. Mwu, Murrue, and Lacus could only look from afar seemingly acknowledging the anguish lingering in the air.

**Lacus' POV**

"Kira-sama..." I whisper to myself.

A beautiful teary-eyed blonde woman about Kira-sama's age wearing what appears to be a high-ranking uniform seemed to have witness the scene firsthand. Wait a minute, getting a better look at the woman, isn't that Cagalli-sama, the Princess of Orb? What is she doing here? Could she have a...

My thoughts were cut off by seeing Cagalli-sama hug Kira-sama warmly, crying silently on his shoulder, which affirms my suspicions...A twinge of jealousy runs through me--wait, no that can't be right...I can't be jealous...Can I? I have never been jealous before... Besides, what am I getting jealous about? There was--we never...we were never together or anything...

After a few moments, Kira-sama grabs a hold of her shoulders and looks sincerely in her amber eyes. He wipes away the remaining tears while kissing her softly on the forehead. That rush of jealousy surges again...why? I have never felt this way before about anybody... I have lived a good life and I was raised well... There is no reason why I should feel envious. Is there...?

**Normal POV**

After reassuring his _sister_, Kira began to head towards the nearest exit that was blocked by three familiar figures that his mind had previously failed to recognize their presence. Though he was hardly affected outwardly, his eyes momentarily flashed to the pink-haired figure that he cared about so much, in so little time. Those feelings were drowned out as the pain of loss consumed the brunette, which in turn led to a fact he knew all too well--especially after witnessing the harshness of reality-- _'Lacus Clyne was not his, never was, never will be.'_

The same dilated pupils of freezing purple was plastered on his eyes as he walked past the three unimpeded. Instinct alone pushed the trio away from the brunette's path, unwilling to clash with him at his present state. Moving past Mwu slowly, Kira spoke in a low yet commanding voice that demanded compliance, "Don't follow me."

With that said, the trio froze in place until the brunette's figure vanished from sight. Once the aura of anguish disappeared, an aura of sadness settled in its place. Mwu led the way over towards the room that Kira and Cagalli were just in, though he already knew what happened, Mwu just wanted see with his own eyes.

All four present inside the stark room wept silently at the gloomy sight before them. Though neither of them were as close as Kira was to her, the impact of her death touched a part deep inside of them.

The world is unfair, life is unfair.

After a while, a few nurses and doctors came in to usher out the crowd since the dreadful silence became unhealthy for anyone--living or deceased. When the four were outside, a gloomy mood still fell upon them seemingly preventing anyone from speaking. Cagalli was the first to let the tears drizzle from her eyes as her attempt to remain strong was proven futile. She was not accustomed to holding in her feelings, whatever they were. Mwu placed a comforting hand on her shoulder and decided to break the silence, "Cagalli...We need to talk..."

"Ah..." Cagalli said absently.

* * *

The drive back was a solemn drive to say the least. No one spoke. No one could speak. No one said anything. All that could be heard was the sound of tears--tears from the heavens that is. The cloudy skies mirroring the mood seemingly crying for such a grave loss and attempting to make up for the quiescence.

However, the eery silence did not bother any of the four languished ones even the least bit. They were all content to talk as soon as an appropriate place was provided, the inside of a car just seemed inappropriate for such a matter. Mwu offered his place to discuss the matters on hand and as eager as he was to find out about something, he knew there was no point in adding increased tension in such a small capacity.

Luck was not on his side today though, nearing the apartment complex, all looked out of the car's windows to see a particular brunette remaining in a still form similar to a tree rooted to the ground. Mwu knew better than to stray from orders sharply given to him even by his former boss and resumed driving towards his apartment. Ever the publicly protective one, Cagalli was the first to object Mwu's actions, "Stop the car Mwu-san! Kira's goina get sick if he stays out in the rain for too long!"

"Iie, hime-sama," Mwu spoke casually.

"Demo--"

Mwu cut her off, "Bothering him now will do nothing for him. He needs space and time."

"I know that..." Cagalli interjected, she did indeed know that, but she would have rather Kira sulked when nature was kind. "How long do you think he will stay out there?"

"I don't know, four hours, eight hours, a whole day, or maybe even a week like that one time..." Mwu answered while recalling the time he witnessed Kira give a week-long vigil after having put his mother to rest with the earth.

"Nani? One week?" Cagalli asked skeptically.

"Ah...I'll tell you about it later," Mwu replied as he pulled into a parking spot. In his rush, Mwu finally noticed that Kira's McLaren F1 was still in the same parking spot as the day before. He concluded that Kira must have used his white/silver/blue colored Hayabusa GSX3600R, the fastest and most maneuverable motorcycle in the universe that Kira himself had hand crafted. _'A part of him must have wanted to kill himself before even getting there...' Mwu said to himself sadly._

Moving on to more important issues, Mwu asked the passengers to take out an umbrella from the hidden compartments within his Beamer. There was no use in all of them getting soaked. Afterwards, the four proceeded to enter the complex solemnly.

* * *

Cups of tea were distributed amongst them. They sat at Mwu's kitchen table that had space enough for three guests. Mwu sat beside Murrue, who sat in front of Lacus, who sat beside Cagalli. Each were reluctant to start s discussion at first, that is until Mwu's eagerness wrestled him out of reluctance.

"So Cagalli--"

"Mwu-san," Cagalli had unceremoniously piped in while Mwu looked defeated, "ah go ahead Mwu-san, gomen."

"Iie, go ahead Hime-sama."

"Iie, go Mwu-san," commanded Cagalli as she sipped a bit of her tea leaving no room for Mwu to decline the offer.

Mwu muttered something about stubborn and commanding blonde princesses and recovered his thoughts, "So Cagalli, do you think Kira will be alright?"

Cagalli spat out her tea carelessly after being caught with such a blunt question right off the bat. Much to Mwu's dismay, he was in the general direction of the simmering liquid. Cagalli quickly apologized as Mwu quickly wiped the burning substance off of his shirt with the aid of Murrue--who blushed soon afterwards at having been caught in a friendly gesture.

After having relieved himself from the searing substance, Mwu muttered something about tea spewing blonde princesses and resumed his inquiry, "So..." he said raising a brow to suggest Cagalli to answer.

"I don't know," Cagalli said truthfully, Kira's hug had only reassured her very little that he would not do anything rash. After receiving a "Nandayo?" and an incredulous look from Mwu, she reiterated much more slowly, "I. Don't. Know."

Mwu sighed as he put up his arms to show his sign of defeat. A victorious smirk emerged on Cagalli's lips as she began to taste the hot tea in habit. Murrue laughed a bit at Mwu's actions and being subdued easily by the feisty blonde. Meanwhile, Lacus continued her silence with a distant look embedded on her delicate features. She was still questioning her earlier feelings of jealousy and envy--two things she really had never experienced having in her life before.

Curiosity getting the best of her, Lacus decided to speak up, "Cagalli-sama, are you Kira's girlfriend?"

Red-faced from the innocent question of the pink-haired princess, Cagalli spat the tea once again at a laughing Mwu who considerably stopped laughing after being doused with the searing substance. Cagalli waved her hands defensively becoming blind to Mwu's plight, "Iie! Kira is my twin brother!" she yelled a little louder than she had intended to at the once oblivious woman next to her.

A small O curved on her delicate lips signaling her understanding. She mouthed an apology to Cagalli and Mwu, who waved her care off as he was rewarded with being treated to Murrue's subconscious caring for him. Deep down, Lacus was relieved to hear such news but she could not determine as to why she was so alleviated.

"Just call me Cagalli, your name is Lacus right?" Cagalli said indignantly in an attempt to change the topic. Lacus nodded in affirmation and after Mwu muttered something about blonde and pink haired princesses together at the same table meant bad news, that awkward silence reared its ugly head.

After calming down, Cagalli soon began her inquiry after being unsettled with the resurgence of that irritable silence, "You don't think he'll do anything rash do you Mwu?"

Mwu scratched his head dumbly trying to come up with a truthful yet assuring answer, "No, I don't think so," he inadvertently took a glance at the pink-haired princess which was noted by the other two females, "But... It's been tough on him..." Mwu's last statement recaptured the attention of all the females, each desperate to gain some more knowledge about Kira's past. Especially Cagalli and Murrue who were left out of the limelight about Kira, though loved him very much, they knew that Kira hardly opened up. If anything, Cagalli would have to force something out of him.

Mwu looked away from the stares as he knew that this discussion would have come sooner or later--preferably later but he had already committed. He sighed as he began to recant his knowledge that he had wanted to share yet was reluctant to do so for rightful reasons. He knew he could not escape the clutches of the women, so he did the smartest thing he could do.

"I must let you ladies know that I have known Kira only since he was four, so I do not know everything that has happened to him--nor am I him, so I could never possibly conceive all that he has seen. I have however, kept surveillance over him since I had become a family friend of his mother, Via Hibiki-sama. I was 16 years old at the time I first started watching him from afar. I was indebted to Via-sama because she was kind enough to lend me a place to stay when my father had kicked me out of the house... Anyway, tragically she would die not too far long, and I had promised to keep watch over her boy..."

Mwu took a deep sigh at what he was going to say next and stated flatly, "He blames himself for her death because he was the target of the Blue Cosmos--After all, he is the Ultimate Coordinator."

Mwu looked at Lacus for supposedly a surprised reaction in which he would judge her as either having been frightened or horrified at the news of his 'revelation'. Much to his surprise, he was proven completely wrong as Lacus remained indiscernible while her caring aura still emanated from her without even the slightest change to such a large piece of news. Mwu was starting to put the picture together.

Cagalli and Murrue were equally surprised since they were the few who had actually known of Kira's Ultimate Coordinatorness and wondered if Lacus had known because of her indifference. Cagalli and Murrue urged Mwu to continue soon after seeing as how they already knew that much about Kira, and wanted to know more. Cagalli asked about the weeklong vigil Kira had while Lacus on the other hand, began to recall the events that happened in the wee hours of the morning that day.

"Ah, before he left for Orb...Kira visited the home in which you two used to live," Mwu said to Cagalli. "His house was sealed up though, only a few people ever went in it. I don't know much about it myself, but Kira emerged carrying another body with him--it was his mother's body." Mwu said while the women began to sadden at what must have been a difficult pill to swallow.

"When he got here," Mwu signaled here as in these apartments. "Kira had no money and so he had to bury Via-sama himself... After he buried her, he stayed up for over 48 hours with a small candle in his hands... I thought he would have stopped his vigil within 24 hours as I didn't want to reveal myself to him yet... I couldn't really." Mwu said a bit apologetically to Cagalli--though Mwu was not suppose to reveal his presence to Kira.

"Well, I got worried after seeing him stand still for over 48 hours. He had not eaten, no relieved himself, hell I don't think he even slept. I had to do something before he would die so I brought him some food and introduced myself to him. With some reluctance I had force fed him some food but he remained there for another 120 hours... I think he must have lost 40 lbs or so." Mwu tried fruitlessly to lighten up such a talk, it was to no avail though. He sighed wishing there was something more he could do for the poor boy. It was a good quarter of an hour before Mwu spoke up again.

* * *

Like a lightning bolt striking down from the heavens, Mwu suddenly experienced an electrical shock through his veins as he recalled a troubling incident that could possibly have a dentrimental impact on Kira's behaviour. He mentally slapped himself for almost forgetting such a time as his resolve in presuming Kira to not act too rashly melted away. Sensing Mwu's distress, the women all bored their eyes into him, letting him know that he should speak out his mind or else.

"Cagalli, has Kira ever told you about a Flay Allster?" Mwu began cautiously, he was already sure that Kira would not have.

"Iie... Flay Allster?" Cagalli responded

"Ah, I thought so. Kira was about 16 at the time, and it was before he was reunited with you." Mwu said while Cagalli just stared blankly motioning for him to continue.

Lacus remembered this part quite well...

* * *

Flay Allster was popular, pretty, smart and the esteemed daughter of George Allster. She was betrothed to an equally popular, handsome, and intelligent young man in Sai Argyle. She was without a doubt wanted by many men; including Kira Yamato. Flay had hardly paid attention to Kira at first, for Kira was only the typical nerd who crushed on her. Though spoiled, selfish, and narrow-minded due to the perfect world she was raised in, she failed to realize the harsh realities of the world.

When her beloved father contracted a disease that stemmed from African Coordinators, George was sent to the finest doctor, natural or coordinator, in the universe; it just so happened that the finest doctor at the time was indeed Kira Yamato. In the midst of tragedy, the niave Flay became enraged at her crumbling world and in an effort to remedy her situation, she immediately took notice of the boy to pressure him more to save her father. Of course, the kind youth was forced to assure her that he would save her father. Reality dictated otherwise as the young doctor diagnosed the man with a very rare and terminal disease known as acanthocheilonemiasis. He soon died an incurable death despite Kira's hardest efforts.

In that instant where her world crumbled, something inside of Flay snapped as the hatred in her heart twisted her mind as she cursed and blamed the existence of all Coordinators alike. Kira Yamato was no exception. Flay saw power inside the boy as a brilliant doctor of Coordinators who previously had flawless records--the death of her father pushed her to cause the boy more misery by weakening his medical mind so whenever he would treat Coordinator patients, he would be half the time be remorseful about her father's death. Many more people died because of Kira's carelessness, which was caused by a consumed Flay, the medical community decided not to revoke his medical degree because of his extraordinary endeavors in the field. Nevertheless, the victims piled on for Kira, which in turn added to more sadness and sorrow and soon Flay would push the boy too far.

In the end, she left him. Never to be seen again.

* * *

"Kira had a bad relationship with Flay, she lied to him about loving him and everything, so he thought he loved her too. It was hard to see but he recognized his relationship for what is was for, it was just guilt that destroyed him for going against morality and succumbing to the tempting pleasure that was to feel loved when he felt loveless...Flay didn't even realize that Kira lived a hard-knock life and was orphaned at a younger age and was the ultimate science project..." Mwu trailed off while turning his head to look at the windows, not wanting to see the tears forming in the women's eyes.

Lacus inevitably broke down as well as she remembered something that Kira had said to her in private and apparently never discussed, _"For just one time, maybe someone could love me for what I truly am... and love me in true understanding, Flay said she did but that was a lie... My friends...My family...can't ever get pass the final wall that blocked them from me..."_

* * *

The night was no longer quiet. It was marked with unfathomable sadness, unheard but spoken. A clock struck the twelfth hour of the day. A lone figure standing in the dark protruded from the vision of the dimming stars. His bangs were drenched as his vision was blurred like the mud surrounding the gravestone he was staring at. The coldness of nature made feeble effects on his rigid body. Though his clothes were damp, there was nothing heavier than his heart at the moment. 

Silent footsteps could be heard approaching the lone figure. The man's violent violet eyes shimmered in frustration of having his reverie broken shamelessly. He thought of a blonde man's over jestering attitude and an unforeseen attitude anger arose within him. This was not a time for games.

"I said don't follow me!" the enraged boy barked loudly.

The encroaching figure stopped momentarily until the footsteps continued.

With an unknown emotion of anger spewing over, the man violently twisted around and grabbed the arms of the infringing person.

"I said--"

Lacus bit her lip from the pain of his hold. His lock on her arms considerably weakened after realizing that he was mistaken in his presumption. The brunette boy solemnly turned around and casted his head towards the ground shamefully. A small trickle of an apology could not escape his lips, though his heart beckoned him to say sorry. He presumed the now drenched and pained woman would leave him alone.

Again was his presumption proven false as a small pair of arms encircled his waist in an embrace. He was caught so off guard that his anger evaporated just as quick as it materialized. His cold and empty eyes remained intact, analogizing a wound that would not heal quickly. After a few silent moments in the rain, the silence was broken by a soft and confused voice, "Why can't I save people?"

"Kira-sama..." Lacus began. "There are times when we try our hardest, and never get what we want..."

"But why can't I save anyone?" Kira said turning around to show her his confused and pained violet eyes.

"There are more people than you think you have saved..." Lacus said simply.

Lacus watched his amethyst eyes soften considerably and it seemed that the rainstorm subsided into a light drizzle. She could now see the faintest trails of tears welling up in his eyes. They did not fall though, Kira turned his head away and wiped the moisture with the sleeves of his drenched shirt. Lacus gave him a questioning look that asked him why does he not let out his feelings.

"I promised I wouldn't cry anymore..." he said simply.

"It's okay to cry when you're sad... That's why people cry..." she replied softly.

A fresh batch of tears formed in the purple eyes and finally, they began to fall voluntarily--the boy no longer held them back or held remorse for crying. He collapsed onto the floor while Lacus did likewise and embraced the weeping boy caringly. For the remainder of the night, the two remained in the same position as each drifted into a gentle slumber.

**_To be continued..._**

* * *

**(A/N) I don't know if I will be working on this one as much asthis other story that Ihave aton of inspiration for... So I don't know when the next update will be. Have a nice day. Ja ne.

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